Page 65 of Body Shot

“Are we really going for a drive on the beach?” I ask him.

“We can if you want to, but I just used it as an excuse for us to escape.”

“Very crafty, Mr. Nyberg.”

The look he gives me is filled with passion and promise and something I can’t quite decipher, but it’s enough to make me lean over to press a quick kiss to his cheek. “We can go for a drive tomorrow night,” I say softly.

“Yeah?” This time when he glances at me, there’s a wicked gleam in his eyes. “Any particular reason you’re in a hurry to be alone with me, sweetheart?”

I smile in what I hope is a seductive manner. “I think tonight’s the night.”

He has to know what I’m referring to, but he doesn’t respond right away.

“The night for…?”

“Come on. Don’t make me spell it out.”

“Oh, I need you to be very specific about this. It’s important.”

“I’m ready to try… you know. The thing we haven’t done.”

He rumbles out a laugh. “You know there are still about a thousand things we haven’t done.”

I lightly smack his shoulder. “Yes, smarty-pants. I do know. And you know exactly what I’m talking about. We can’t keep doing this everything but routine. It’s time for me to push past my fear. I have to know for sure, one way or another, that I’m okay physically.”

“Agreed. But you also have to be mentally and emotionally prepared.”

“I think I am.”

“Well, I need to know that you are one thousand percent ready to do it. There’s no universe where I make any assumptions about this particular sexual act. At least, not the first time.”

I take a deep breath and slowly let it out. “I’m nervous, but ready. I want you to make love to me tonight, Anders.”

TWENTY-THREE

Anders

It’s beenabout a decade since I was nervous about sex, but this is different. There are so many levels to what she wants me to do, I’m struggling to unwrap them all. There’s the physical part. That’s the biggest and most important. Allowing me to put my penis inside of her vagina. It sounds ridiculous to phrase it that way, even in my head, but until we can do that, without fear or pain, nothing else matters. I’d planned to start with fingers, but she seems anxious to get this over with.

I never like to think about sex in terms of getting it over with, but I understand it in this scenario.

Mostly, I don’t want her to be afraid.

I also don’t want to hurt her.

Intellectually, I’m sure I won’t.

She’s been to the doctor and gotten the okay.

She had surgery to remove her hymen.

There shouldn’t be any problems.

People have been inserting peg A into slot B for millennia. It’s the most natural thing in the world.

Unless you had a medical anomaly that left you with a bad taste in your mouth. So to speak.

But her nervousness makes me a little anxious as well, and I’m not sure whether I should communicate that or if I should simply man up and be strong for her. She needs me to take the lead, but this is one time where I’m reluctant. Frankly, I probably want to get this over worth even more than she does.

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