Page 66 of Play Book

The warmth of his breath and the timber of his voice makes gooseflesh break out on my skin, and I can’t help but sigh a little.

“I don’t think we’ve spent enough time together for us to have reached that level, that’s all.”

“If I didn’t care about you, do you think we’d be here?”

“You were very clear that you don’t do relationships and that you’re not looking for one. Then two weeks later you call me your girlfriend. Excuse me for having a tiny bit of whiplash.”

“Okay. You’re right. I just…” He gazes over at Ally. “This probably isn’t the best time to have this conversation.”

My heart sinks a little.

I was right.

He’s only been doing what’s convenient.

Trying not to embarrass me or give Ally any ammunition to use against either of us. If I’m his girlfriend, it validates my place in his life. Because he can’t come out and say we’re fuck buddies.

I get it.

But it still hurts.

“It’s all right,” I say. “I understand. You don’t have to explain. You’re trying to put on your best face for Ally.”

“No, that’s not?—”

“Hey, you ready to go?” Stevie asks me, interrupting him. “It’s late and I have a video call at eight in the morning with a magazine editor in France.” She offered to drive me home earlier, and it feels like the perfect time to put an end to a conversation that isn’t going anywhere. Not anywhere good, anyway.

“You’re ready to leave?” I ask, reaching for my purse.

“Yeah, it’s almost one. Eight a.m. comes early.”

“Of course.” I pull out my wallet. “How much do I owe you?”

Canyon’s eyes darken again.

Normally, I love that side of him.

But not tonight.

Tonight, I just feel used and let down, and I’m not sure why.

He hasn’t lied to me.

We have an agreement.

I don’t know why calling me his girlfriend, or his lack of explanation for why, bothers me so much.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” he says. “It’s on me.”

“Oh.” I force a little smile. “Well, next time will be on me.”

I can see that bothers him, but I don’t feel like arguing with him.

More than anything, I want to get out of here.

Retreat.

Lick my wounds.

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