Page 51 of Play Book

“Are you guys trying?” Chey asks.

“Sort of? We’re using condoms but I’m not on birth control anymore.”

I see the look on Stevie’s face and my heart hurts for her.

She’s trying so hard to be supportive and happy for Autumn, but there’s no doubt she’s heartbroken. She had a miscarriage a few months ago that led to hemorrhaging and an emergency hysterectomy. It’s been hard to watch her coming to terms with everything that’s happened, and we’re all trying to be there for her.

Unfortunately, anything to do with weddings and babies sets her off, but I don’t know how we can avoid all of that. Autumn and Henrik, and Ivan and Chey, are both getting married this summer, and since Henrik is sixteen years older than Autumn, we know they plan to start trying immediately. Gabe and Harper have been trying, too.

Babies aren’t really on my radar.

I want a family someday, but not until I have the right man at my side.

One that probably isn’t going to be Canyon, so it’s ironic that he’s apparently already a dad.

That’s a twist I wasn’t expecting.

Not that it impacts me one way or the other.

My gut tells me this thing between us is going to be short-lived and maybe that’s for the best. I’m okay with risking my heart, but getting hurt is never fun, and he’s the kind of guy who could hurt me.

I have plenty to keep me busy, so I don’t plan to dwell on it. Between the gallery, a few acting and modeling jobs that have been lined up for a while, and keeping up with my friends, I don’t have time to worry about a guy who doesn’t want to be in a relationship.

Even if the sex is out of this world.

Even though I really like him.

“You’re thinking about Canyon,” Stevie says, linking her arm through mine.

“A little,” I admit.

“You think it’ll matter if he has a kid?”

“Not to me, but you know how guys are. He’s been very clear that he’s not interested in getting serious.”

“Yeah, but they all say that, don’t they?”

“I don’t know,” I admit. “No other guy has ever said that to me before. I’ve dated guys who wanted to keep things casual, but it was always mutual.”

Her face falls, and she shrugs one shoulder. “I guess I’m that needy girl who always falls in love with emotionally unavailable men.”

“You’ve had a rough couple of years,” I soothe, “but you’re going to come out the other side. I promise, there is someone out there for you.”

“Yeah, probably some old guy with a bunch of adult kids. No one my age is going to want a woman who can’t give him kids.”

“That’s ridiculous. Lots of people our age don’t want kids. I can name three friends off the top of my head who don’t want them.”

She nods but looks away. “Oh, hey, there’s Addy. I’m going to go say hi.”

“All right.” I watch her practically scurry away, and sigh sadly.

“Is she freaking out?” Harper asks, coming up behind me, her voice soft.

“No. But she’s sad. She’s reached the no-one-will-ever-love-me-now-that-I-can’t-have-kids stage of grief.”

Harper makes a face. “Don’t tell the others, but I’m about five weeks pregnant. It’s too soon to tell anyone, but I’m dreading having to tell Stevie.”

“I’m so happy for you,” I whisper, hugging her. “But yeah, we’ll try to come up with a way to soften the blow.”

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