Page 75 of My December Darling

Will you ever be ready?

After Aiden broke up with me, I was careful about the men I chose to hook up with. I stuck to flings that left me feeling more hollow than fulfilled because casual was easy. It wassafe. It meant not opening myself up to someone else until I was ready, and picking people who never pushed me out of that comfort zone to begin with.

While I’m not a hundred percent there yet, Luke has slowly started to dismantle my beliefs, replacing them with what-if scenarios.

What if I no longer punished myself for hurting my sister and allowed myself a chance at true happiness?

What if I stuck around Lake Wisteria for a little longer to see where things could go between Luke and me?

What if I stopped worrying about everything that could go wrong with dating my ex-boyfriend’s best friend and embraced the possibility of falling in love with him instead?

Luke interrupts my spiral with a kiss to the top of my head. “Let’s just go with the flow.”

My face flushes. “You sure?”

“Yeah. We don’t owe anyone any explanations.”

I release a heavy exhale. “You’re right.”

I just need a little more time, I want to say but don’t.

Don’t give up on me just yet, I think but don’t share aloud.

Show me that whatever we have is worth the fight, even if I doubt it,I beg without uttering a single word.

Luke’s smile lacks its usual dose of sunshine, appearing far less confident than earlier as he leads me out of the kitchen. I ignore the pang in my chest and make a vow to myself to figure out what I want from all this before I leave Lake Wisteria again.

22

CATALINA

Luke and I spend the next few days balancing our work schedules, writing the maid of honor speech, and making some good progress on the LEGO set. I wish I could slow time down, but the days go by too quickly, and next thing I know, Gabriela and Aiden’s big day is finally here.

While I’m happy for my sister, I’m counting down the hours until it’s over. As the maid of honor, my duties are endless from the moment I wake up. Makeup and hair appointments. Countless photo-ops, first in matching robes, followed by our wedding outfits. A first-look photoshoot that had Gabriela ruining her makeup and left Aiden teary-eyed, which was both lovely and frustrating seeing as my sister needed to have her face retouched a few minutes before she was expected to walk down the aisle.

I haven’t seen Luke yet, so when I find him waiting for me at the foot of the stairs, my heart skips a few beats. Yesterday, we practiced this same routine of exiting the small building attached to the back of the church together and walking down the aisle at the same time, but this time, it feels different.

I’ve seen Luke in scrubs, jeans, and a ridiculous elf costume that still makes me break out into laughter to this day, but him in a tux?

Damn. I’m struck with the urge to kiss him until we’re both breathless, lipstick be damned.

“You look…” His darkening gaze travels down the length of me, making me shiver. “Absolutely stunning.”

My knees go weak at the huskiness in his voice, and I wobble on my heels. I reach for the stair rail before I lose my balance and fall forward.

“You think so?”

“I won’t be able to keep my eyes off you.”

My cheeks warm under his hungry eyes. “You don’t look too bad yourself.”

He smooths out his lapels. “Less Captain America, more Batman today?”

I crack a smile. “Eh. I wouldn’t go that far.”

“You sure know how to compliment a man.”

I take another step closer to him. “Would you rather I say what’s really on my mind?”

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