Page 42 of A Little Secret

The guy doesn’t buy it for a second. “You want me to come in with you?”

It’s a good question. I should say no. The unpregnant version of me would’ve without hesitation. Now? Now, I could use a little support, and whether or not I want to admit it, Griffin’s given me more than I could ever ask for. I should decline his offer, though. If Griff comes in with me, Drew will lose his shit. But I’m tired of putting Drew’s needs above my own. I’ve done it for so long I’ve almost forgotten what it feels like to voice what I want. What I need. My little impromptu road trip with Griffin has reminded me of the opposite. That I’m allowed to have wants and needs and a person who supports—and delivers—said wants and needs in spades. Without bitching. Without grumbling. Without guilt-tripping.

Griff’s a fixer. He’s always been a fixer. And right now, he wants to help me fix my situation with Drew, even to his own detriment. If only fixing this was easy.

“Maybe just…” I wave my hand toward the front area of the building. “Stay close? I’ll call you if I need you.”

Tucking his hands into the front pockets of his jeans, he rocks back on his heels, his wary gaze never leaving mine. “Sure thing.”

“Thanks.” I offer him another smile—though it’s as forced as before—and arch my shoulders back, preparing for the inevitable. It’s going to be fine. It’s going to be one hundred percent, totally and completely fine. I mean, let’sbe honest, my mom and dad got pregnant with my big brother when they were still dating. Yeah, she’d just graduated from LAU, and my dad most definitely had a stable job, but look how they turned out? Totally and completely fine. They also never fought and already lived together, but…poe-tae-toe, poe-tah-toe.Poe-tah-toe.Who says potato like that, anyway? No one, that’s who.

“You goin’?” Griffin prods.

“Right.” Clearing my throat, I unclench my fists, keep my head held high, and make my way toward the front of the building, one slow step at a time.

There are thirteen. Steps, that is. If that isn’t a bad omen, I don’t know what is. I skip the last stair just in case, then shake out my hands. I can do this. Easy peasy, lemon squeezy. Praying the punch code to enter the building is the same as when I last visited, I type it in and wait for the familiar unclicking of the lock.

Click.

With a deep breath, I grab the handle and open the main doors. Did it smell this stuffy the last time I was here? I search my memory but come up empty. Maybe it’s my super human pregnancy nose or something. Maybe my rose-colored glasses have cracked. Or maybe I’m saying my rose-colored glasses have faded because I’m afraid that as soon as I tell Drew I’m pregnant, his rose-colored glasses will be shattered forever, and this whole thing will blow up in my face irrevocably.

Yeah, that’s not a nauseating rabbit hole of negativity to fall down at all, Finley.

Focus.

Drew’s room is on the first floor. Second door on the right. I lift my hand, preparing to knock, but the door’s already cracked. Curious, I peek inside. The rooms are laid out into tiny apartments. The main area has a smallgathering space and kitchenette with two doors leading to the bedrooms. Drew’s parents shelled out a lot of money for the big room he has all to himself while Charles and Patrick share the second space. A horror movie is playing on the television in the main area. Honestly, I’m impressed. Drew hates horror movies. The back of his dark, shaggy head comes into view, along with long blonde hair pulled into a ponytail.

I wait for the gut punch to fully sink in, but it doesn’t. Instead, numbness spreads through me. He isn’t cheating. He isn’t even technically snuggling, or maybe he is and the angle is more forgiving than it should be. They do look…close. And comfortable. Comfortable in a way I’ve never seen Drew. Not with anyone but me. Doesn’t make it easier. The reminder of how different our lives are now that we’ve built them a few states away from each other. Honestly, should I really have expected anything less?

My gut’s been telling me this for months. If only I’d listened. Now, it’s too late. I need to get this over with.

Wiping my sweaty palms against my pants, I lift my hand to push the door open when a warm body hits my back.

“Can I help you?” a high yetalmostmasculine voice asks.

I peek over my shoulder and find one of Drew’s roommates. Okay, so Drew’s not on anactualdate. That’s something, isn’t it? Or hell, maybe he’s into orgies now. Wouldn’t that be a fun turn of events?

Remembering my manners, I step aside and give the guy a small wave while my brain scrambles to figure out how the hell I should handle this situation. “Oh. Hi, Charles.”

“Frita, right?” he asks.

“Finley,” I correct. “But close. B- for effort.” My gazedrops to the orange bowl of popcorn cradled in his arms. Yup. He’s definitely included in the little movie afternoon they’ve got going for them. Interesting. “I, uh, I see youpoppedout of your room for a snack? Get it? ‘Cause it’s popcorn?”

“Yes, I’m familiar with puns.” He scoots his glasses up on the bridge of his nose. “Hello again.”

“Hello to you, too. Here, let me.” I push the door to his room open, then follow him inside without waiting for an invitation.

“Hey, what took you so—” Drew’s jaw drops, making him look like a pathetic goldfish at the pet store as the girl beside him follows his gaze.

Well, would you look at that. If it isn’t the infamous @mollie69.

Recognizing me, she scoots away, her head snapping back toward the television. She reaches for the remote, pauses the show, then turns into a freaking mannequin.

Sorry, girl. I’m not a dinosaur. I can still see you, even if you aren’t moving.

With one hand on my hip, I put on the same fake-ass smile I’m all too familiar with and give Drew my full attention. “Hello, boyfriend.”

“Finley!” He rushes toward me, pulling me into a full-bodied hug that makes my body recoil. Seriously. Is he this dense? As my feet lift from the ground, he spins me around and squeezes me tighter than a boa constrictor, making it hard for me to breathe. Or maybe it’s the entire situation making me feel like I’m suffocating. Regardless, the over-the-top hug is almost enough to make me believe Drew’s happy I’m here if I hadn’t seen how wide his eyes were when I walked in on him ten seconds ago.