Page 116 of The Throne's Undoing

Even if it was the last thing she did.

Even if it meant she had nowhere to run to, no castle to her name.

She would destroy them.

She would destroy everything the king cared about by becoming the blade that would pierce his very heart.

One day, anyway.

Because right now, despite this newfound resolve, all she could do was lie in her filth, her head resting atop her knees as she held herself as if she might fall apart.

She tried to stuff all the feelings back inside and stitch herself back together. She tried to hide away everything she had been ignoring, but she couldn't.

Without the block that Myra had placed in her mind, Kallie was drowning in her thoughts and emotions: her dead brother, her pretend father who had never cared, the fire in the temple, the fire all those years ago that had started it all.

Her life had become a series of fires and lies, and she couldn't find her way out.

It was an endless cycle, an endless torrent that kept repeating and repeating. But she needed it to stop. She needed it to stop like she needed air.

Kallie tried counting.

One.

Breathe in.

Two.

Hold.

Three.

Breathe out.

A knock came at the door, but she ignored it. She started counting again.

One.

Two.

Three.

Shoes clapped against the ground, and her eyes sprung open. Soaked tendrils of her hair had fallen in front of her face, but she didn't dare move. She pretended he wasn't there. She tried counting again, trying to focus on the numbers, her breathing, and most definitely not on Graeson's presence.

One--

"Kalisandre," Graeson said. But based on his voice, he was still several feet away. Near the threshold of the bathing chambers, if Kallie had to guess.

So she ignored him, hoping he would leave.

She squeezed her eyes closed andwilledhim to go away.

If the gods wished to show her any mercy, they would make him leave.

But did she deserve their mercy? She had brought this on herself after all, hadn't she?

Deep breath in.

One. Two--

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