Page 101 of As the World Falls

“Oh,” I murmur. I didn’t know what else to say. I wanted to reach out to him, but I couldn’t. The restrictions between us felt heavier and heavier by the second.

“He was a businessman, only made enough to get himself by. He died of liver failure from alcoholism,” he relents.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I’m not. I know the truth.”

I sigh. “Why are you telling me all of this so easily?”

He walks toward me, and I try really, really hard to keep my eyes on him and not on his very bare chest, which I very much want to glide a finger down. “Because I want you to know me. Because you’re the one thing I can’t solve in my life. Because you drive me to madness, Cecilia.”

“Madness,” I repeat in a whisper, knowing that feeling all too well.

He stops just in front of me, placing one hand on the door frame beside my head and leaning into me. “Why have you been ignoring all my calls and texts?”

I try not to look directly into his eyes. “I have nothing to say to you.”

“After having so much before? Have you already given up on me so easily?”

His words claw at my chest. “I can’t have any part of your lifestyle anymore, James. It isn’t normal. It’s dangerous. It’s best to keep some distance between us.”

He leans slightly closer, and despite having just worked out, he smells fresh and earthy. I liked it way too much, but I didn’tfind myself moving away like I knew I should. “Like right now?” he murmurs, his gaze falling to my mouth before meeting my eyes again. “This kind of distance?”

My heart thunders in my chest, a beat urging me to close the distance between us that it’s been craving. I want to feel his lips, taste him again, and be so wrapped up in him that I can’t see the shadows lurking behind him.

“Well, this whole ordeal was kind of against my will,” I remark, my voice barely audible.

He lifts his hand, his fingers resting on my chin as his thumb grazes over my bottom lip, pulling it down and letting it pop back into place. “So, you’d have never spoken to me again if it weren’t for practically kidnapping you?”

“No,” I lie.

He smirks again. “What if I told you again how much I wanted to be yours? Would you speak to me then?”

Somehow, my heart beats wilder. I’m so warm with him in front of me like this, saying things like that. It was everything I wanted and didn’t at the same time. “I…I don’t believe you,” I tell him.

“Hmm,” he hums, his gaze roaming down me. His hand drops from my chin, and he uses it to play with the hem of my dress until it’s balled in his fist, and he’s slowly pulling it up, exposing my thighs beneath it. “What if I showed you?”

My blood turns hot, muddying my thoughts and logic, and I find myself leaning closer to him now. “Sh-show me how?”

He presses his palm to my thigh, the fabric beneath creating a barrier so that his skin isn’t directly touching mine. I hated it, but it felt so good at the same time. His hand pushed the dress up until it rested so close to my intimate spot, just barely exposing me. He was doing nothing and so much at once. I was breathing heavily, silently begging in my head for him to take me and use me however he wanted.

“Do you feel that?” he asks.

“Feel what?” My voice is so breathy, which would embarrass me if I wasn’t so turned on right now.

“You’re so warm, babe. You can’t catch your breath. You barely have any control left, and I’ve only just caressed your skin over your clothes. That’s how I feel just looking at you. That’s how much I want you.”

I shut my eyes, reveling in his hands on me while his words float over me. He balls my dress in his fist again and pulls it up until my lower half is exposed. He steps into me, forcing me back against the door frame. I feel the cool wood against the back of my thighs as it stops me from moving further. He makes a deep growling noise in the back of his throat as he stares between our bodies pressed together, mine more exposed than it should be.

“Why aren’t you stopping me?” He murmurs, his voice guttural and hungry.

“I don’t know,” I whisper shamefully.

He smiles at that. “Are you going to stop me if I kiss you right now?”

“I should.”

“But will you, my Cecilia?” I nod weakly, letting him lean closer as his smile widens. He moves past my mouth, where I thought he’d test his theory, but stops at my ear instead. “Liar,” he whispers darkly. Goosebumps race down my arms and legs as I fall deeper under his spell. He pulls back and lifts my chin with his finger as he does, angling my mouth toward his. “Stop me,” he demands.