Page 51 of Hunting His Vampire Mate

“I couldn’t stop,” Danny said, giving a hollow-sounding laugh. “I wouldn’t have blamed you if you had put a bullet in me. I’m pretty sure I still wouldn’t, even now.”

“The fact that you can say that to me just proves that I’m a dick. And that I shouldn’t have left you alone with Count Chucklefuck.”

Danny snorted a little, shaking his head. “He’s such an—”

“Asshole?” I suggested.

I glanced over at him at the same moment he did, and we both laughed.

Danny had wiped his face in my absence, but there were a couple smears of blood he’d missed. But I had seen him bloody plenty of times before. How could I have let that come between us? It was such a small thing.

“That wasn’t what it was, and you know it.” I should have felt startled that he’d heard my thoughts, but I didn’t. It was already our new normal. Danny lost his smile. “Michael… look, I don’t ever really say this, but I’m kind of freaked right now.”

“It’d be pretty fucking weird if you weren’t.”

“I feel like me. Butthat—that wasn’t me. It was somethingelse.”

I let out a breath and nodded.

If I couldn’t be Michael the mundane and I couldn’t be Michael the hunter, then I would be Michael the—well, fuck. The guy who was in love with Danny. I hoped he was enough.

“Look, it makes sense. You’ve got these urges now. These impulses that aren’t fully human anymore. That’s going to take some time to get used to. For both of us.”

“Listen, if I go too far, I need you to kill me.”

“You can fuck right off with that bullshit. We covered this. I’m safe around you.”

Definitely still Michael, the guy who loved Danny. Love was good, but it wasn’t always sunshine and rainbows, was it? Sometimes it had teeth. And sometimes that was necessary.

“I mean it. If you can’t do it, call Aubrey. Or someone. Or, hell, have Tobias turn me into a tea cozy or something. But please don’t let me be a monster who hurts people.”

“No. There is no world in which I would ever fucking do that, Danny. And it won’t come to that. I won’t let it. If I have to spend every moment of my life—”

“Michael, stop it! Don’t feel like you have to be the hero here! If you at least need some time to figure out how you actually feel about any of this, I get it. This is—I don’t even know what this is. But it’s a lot. And it’s okay if you want—”

“Look, what Iwantis to be the kind of guy who doesn’t run out on you the second things get a little weird!” I snapped. I didn’t want to get angry with him, but it was important for him to understand. “This whole thing, just now—Iwas the one who screwed this up! Not you.”

“Right,” he shot back. “How’s this? If I hadn’t gotten jealous and gone off on my own, none of this would’ve happened in the first place. We could be kicking back a bottle of Jack together. Or sleeping. Probably sleeping. I wouldn’t be…”

He trailed off, like he wasn’t sure what words could adequately describe what he was now. But he sounded miserable again. And his emotions were taut like piano wire. I could feel his guilt. His grief. His shame, that this had become his life—and that I was determined to make it mine, too.

Unacceptable.

I threaded his fingers with mine. His skin was surprisingly warm to the touch. But then, Danny was always warm, wasn’the? Underneath it all. It was something I’d loved about him for years.

“You told me you were in love with me months ago. If I had talked to you like I was a real person and not—whatever the hell it is that I’ve been instead—then yeah, none of this would’ve happened, either. It’s not your fault.”

“It’s not yours either.” Danny shot me a glare.

“Danny,” I chided him. “Maybe it can be both of our faults and neither of our faults. But it doesn’t change anything. I don’t want to go anywhere. What just happened doesn’t change that.”

Something gave in his expression: a tiny, jagged piece of armor he’d been clinging to so tightly it had been causing him to bleed. I felt it the moment he let go and allowed himself to believe me. Toreallybelieve me.

“I’m not going anywhere,” I said again, knowing he’d hear it this time. “And it’s better that we know that your instincts can get like that sometimes. It’s better that this was with a blood bag and not something worse. I’mgladthis happened. Now we know.”

“I’m going to need to leave,” Danny breathed, watching me with wide eyes. There was a fire burning in them. A naked, raw vulnerability, right there on the surface, that I had never seen in him before. “Thierry’s right about that part. I thought I had everything under control, but I don’t.”

“Yeah,” I replied. “I guess it’s a good idea for you to take some time off the road and get a handle on all of this. It’s probably the best thing we can do in this situation. You ought to be around people who can help you get through this. But I’m coming with you.”

---