Page 84 of The Golden Boys

After weeks of struggling, I feel a small measure of my power return, but his darkening stare undoes that smidgen of confidence immediately, then obliterates it when he asks a bold question.

“So, whodoyou open your legs for then?”

There’s bitterness in his tone that I don’t really know how to place. Maybe the sting of having been turned down has finally set in? Whatever the case, something about the way he asked has me defensive.

“All you need to know is they’re closed to you,” I assure him, folding both arms across my chest.

He glances down, reading my body language and, just like that, anger flashes across his face again.

The monster never strays too far. I see him emerge from the shadows right before my eyes—when West’s brow tenses, when he stares down on me like I’m nothing.

He’s always so hot and cold.

“What the hell do you see in him?”

My brow tenses when he asks, unsure what he means by that. “What do I see in who?”

Hearing my question, he seems uncomfortable. Like he’s suddenly aware of having said too much. He shoves both hands inside his pockets, seeming to mull over how he should respond to my question.

“I’m talking about the shady guy. The one who’s sniffing behind you every time I turn around,” he finally says.

The words burn with envy and I ease up a bit, fighting a smile. “Wait a second. Are you jealous of Ricky?”

“I’m jealous of no one.”

I don’t buy that for even a second, and with how he just dragged me away from Dane in front of everyone, I’m guessing he knows that already. So, seeing a golden opportunity to get under West’s skin, I take it.

When I reach for his tie, he glances down at it, and then his gaze flashes to mine as I speak. “Since you asked so nicely, Ricky was the first.”

Thinking that’s pretty self-explanatory, I don’t elaborate, but I’m surprised when another question flies from West’s mouth.

“And who was the last?”

His tone is still so sharp, reeking of authority he doesn’t actually have when it comes to me. He isn’t owed an explanation about my sex life, nor is it clear why he seems toneedthis question answered. However, the harsh stare locked on me says as much, and for reasons I don’t quite understand myself, I offer up the info he’s nowherenearentitled to.

“Ricky wasn’t just the first. He was the only.”

Not only is it super awkward that I’ve just shared this detail about myself, but I’m frustrated that I complied. Maybe because I’m certain he won’t believe a single word of it, with his opinions about girls from my hood. But I’m not ashamed of who I am, and if he doesn’t buy that, then it’s on him. Not me.

“Swear to me,” he presses, and I feel my brow twitch with confusion.

My mouth falls open before I’m able to respond, but I’m keenly aware of there being so much more going on here, something he’s not saying despite saying so much.

“I don’t have a reason to lie,” I state boldly.

There’s an uncomfortable pause where he should’ve spoken, and I feel pressured to fill the void myself.

“Were you seriously ready to judge me if there were more?” I ask. “Seeing as how I’d have to block off my schedule for an entire week to hear your list?”

He doesn’t laugh when I do, instead choosing to study my expression. Like a red sign that reads “LIAR” is going to start flashing on my forehead. I imagine this to be how criminals must feel while under investigation, but I don’t let it get to me. I’m not crazy, though. Dude got super intense on me out of nowhere.

Redness pools beneath his skin and I imagine his face to be hot to the touch. The crimson color only deepens when I smirk again, and his stare stays trained on me when I slip from between his body and the locker I rested against. I feel his eyes chasing after me as I leave him behind.

“Where the hell do you think you’re going? We’re not done here, Southside,” his voice thunders.

But I don’t owe him more of this conversation. Which is why I keep moving and wiggle my fingers teasingly to wave goodbye.

“Oh, we’re definitely done here,” I say. “I’ve already told you more about me than you deserve to know.”