Page 171 of We Redeemed the Rain

Jackie turned to me. “The best part is the ability to work remote. If you get hired, maybe Aunt Judith will let us camp out at the cabin for a few weeks this fall. We can have a data entry party, go hiking, eat a party-sized bag of Starburst, and watch movies.”

“Sounds fun,” I replied with no enthusiasm whatsoever.

Jackie gave Peter a pointed look. Whispered, “Happy?”

They chatted a while about dinner plans. Apparently, Peter and Sarah were there to stay for the evening and wanted to watch the Rockies’ game. I nodded and laughed when I was supposed to, even going as far as chiming in about what take-out I wanted, even though I had no plans to eat.

Life, days, seemed to stretch out into infinity. Me—in data entry. Tag—at the ranch.

That big skied, open-air ranch.

Every interaction drained my energy reserves. I felt my smile grow smaller as I slipped down into the seat. My blinks grew heavier, my extremities more numb.

And I felt a breeze, uncomfortably warm. One too warm for Colorado.

I heard someone fire-up the semi.

I saw rolling hills and the sun setting behind the big house—that burst of pink over the sky as the sun dipped behind the horizon.

I smelled hay, dirt, horses, molasses.

“Beatles.”

I jerked back to awareness, sitting up straighter. “Huh? Yep?”

Jackie, Sarah, Kelsey, and Erica were talking in the kitchen. Peter must’ve been watching me space out.

“You look like you’re about to collapse.”

“Yeah, I’m tired.”

He shook his head, mumbling, “You aren’t tired. I’ve never seen you like this.”

I lifted a shoulder. At this point, my family knew the basics: Tag and I were penpals, we fell in love, and he had some personal issues regarding his past he needed to work through in order to be ready for more. If “more” was even on the horizon. Obviously, I bulked up the explanation a little bit and left out his personal details and my suspicions. I figured if Tag wanted people to know what happened that night, he’d tell them. In the meantime, I tried to cast him in as positive a light as I could. I didn’t want my family to dislike him should there be a potential future for us.

But, they knew I hadn’t heard from him. I couldn’t keep it off my face if my life depended on it. Every day that went by, the “more” I was hoping for seemed further and further away.

“I’m guessing you haven’t heard from him still?”

“No.”

He sighed. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s all good.”

“No, it’s not. He sounds like a tool.”

Immediate emotions grabbed my throat and squeezed so hard I could barely breathe. I whispered, “He’snota tool.”

“You are defending a guy who clearly doesn’t deserve you.”

“No, Peter, you don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Well, I’m worried. You weren’t even this messed up when David cheated on you.”

David felt like Little League compared to Tag. Abruptly, I stood on wobbling legs. “I think I’m going to go to bed. Can you put my food in the fridge?”

“Bea.”