Page 48 of The Roommate Remodel

“Absolutely,” I squeak as my heart thunders in my chest.

Brax looks at me a second longer. “I’ll go first.” He starts up the metal staircase that seems to touch the sky.

I swallow down the lump in my throat and force my feet forward, willing myself not to look down.

Brax races to the top with superhuman speed, not even bothering to use the rail. Then he glances down at me. “You planning on zip-lining next year?”

I scowl at him. “You can go without me,” I utter as my hands sweat. “Just remember that I warned you.”

“I’ll wait,” he says, looking over the top of the railing.

If I can’t even climb to the platform without lead feet, how in the world am I going to hurl myself off of it?

Do people enjoy seeing their life flash before their eyes?

My stomach churns as I push the thought away. I won’t let Brax see me afraid. I’ll just force myself to step off the platform even if I throw up my lunch.

When I finally stumble to the top, out of breath and completely frazzled, Brax is lazily leaning against the railing, shoulders relaxed, like he’s posing for a Patagonia magazine spread. To my aggravation, he’s completely at home up here.

“The view from here is amazing,” he says, glancing over the treetops. I force myself to tear my eyes away and look just beyond him. The land spreads out below us like a forest blanket, taking my breath away. The trees are a mixture of mossy greens, and small clumps of gold and red bushes punctuate the landscape. Even though I’m fighting a dizzying sense of vertigo as I peer over the edge, the view is stunning.

Suddenly, his hand lands on my arm, and I let out a strangled squeak. “What are you trying to do?” I shriek while shrinking away from him. “Push me over so I plunge toward my death?”

“No. Why would I do that?” he shoots back, holding up hishands in innocence. “I was trying to help. You’ve gone all pale, and I thought you were scared. Are you okay?” His concern cuts through my mounting panic.

“Scared?” A shrill laugh escapes my lips. “I laugh in the face of danger, Brax MacPherson.” My laugh turns into a cough, and I double over, feeling like I’m going to be sick. If I don’t get myself under control, this is going to turn into a full-on panic attack.

I can’t have Brax witness that.

“Right,” Brax says, frowning at me. “Because you look about as comfortable as a cat in a bathtub.” He arches an eyebrow.

“Fine.” I straighten, trying to gain my composure, before I fold my arms defensively. “I haven’t exactly been honest.”

“About?” He waits for an answer.

I clear my throat. “Heights aren’t my favorite thing. I’d rather strap myself to a railroad track.”

“So you’re saying...” He studies me carefully. “You’ve never been zip-lining before because of heights?”

I lift a shoulder in resignation. “Too afraid.”

He frowns. “So you agreed to this event and weren’t planning on going?”

“Maybe?” I squeak.

Brax gives me a look.

I shrug. “Okay, yes. I was always planning on bailing. I didn’t want to let Coach Thompson or you guys down. After all, I’m the one who made you go to the elementary school. It only seemed fair. Except that I have this wee little problem.” If I tell him, he’ll only think less of me. Especially since he’s the one who overcame his fear for me.

“Finish the sentence, Jaz. What is your wee little problem? Or is that a bathroom joke?”

“Not a bathroom joke. Although that would have been funnier.” I kick at a leaf on the platform. It drops off the edge and floats to the ground, fluttering like paper. “This is embarrassing.” I pull a wisp of hair behind my ear and start slowly. “I sometimes... have these attacks. Heights seem to trigger it.”

His forehead crinkles in concern. “Attacks? Like panic?”

I play with Granny’s ring, then nod.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asks, the lines deepening. “I could have left you behind.”

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