Page 61 of Wasted On You

He looked at her as if she were crazy, and maybe she was. Then he backed away, clearly unhappy with the situation. “I can’t do this, Ivy. I’ll call a cab or get Jacob to come get me.”

“Wait. Let me try to explain.” Desperate, she took a step toward him, her mind frantically looking for an explanation Mike Paul would accept without betraying Kip.

“I think we’re done tonight.”

“Put your phone away.”

He had the device to his ear.

“Oh, for the love of God, Mike Paul. Kip and I have an understanding.”

“What do you mean by that?” He glanced at her, his expression dark.

“Does it matter?”

“Yes. It does.” Mike Paul took a moment. He held up his hand when she opened her mouth to respond, and while he quickly typed out a message, she couldn’t help but think she’d just screwed things up badly. When he was done, he put away his phone and turned to her.

“I came here because I wanted you so bad I couldn’t see beyond it. You’ve been like a drug in my system, one I can’t kick, and up until a few moments ago, I thought being with you was the cure. I thought that by making you mine again, we could be together.” His eyes narrowed, his nostrils flared, and that dark look on his face intensified. “Let me be clear about this. I want you. All of you. All the time. I want to wake up with you in my bed and go to sleep at night, knowing there’s no one else but me. And yeah, it might have taken me years to figure that shit out, so I apologize for being dense.”

“What about last year?” she asked the question that had burrowed beneath her skin forever, it seemed. “After we were together, I thought things would be different. But then I never got a phone call or text. And the next time I saw you, you acted like we were pals. Like it was normal for you to take me into your bed and then act like it never happened. You treated me like all the other women you’ve been with, and that hurt.” Her throat constricted.

“I was…” He swore and looked away. “I was confused. It felt like I’d crossed a line. Taken advantage of you or something.”

“Taken advantage?”

“You and Millie Sue had more than a few drinks that night. I didn’t know if it was the booze that fueled what you felt. You were not the Ivy I was used to. I knew that I’d never felt like that before, and it scared the shit out of me. That might sound like the lamest excuse in the world, but it’s the truth.”

All that anger she’d stockpiled for the past year bubbled to the surface. “You’re a grown-ass man. Even if that’s how you felt, I deserved more because of our history.”

“You’re right, and I’m sorry. You gotta believe me. If I could go back and be a better man, I would. But I can’t. I can only do my best now.”

She tried to clear her thoughts, but one thing kept coming at her over and over. “I don’t know if I can trust you with my heart.”

“I want the chance to prove that you can. But you’re engaged. And the Ivy I know wouldn’t settle for a toss between the sheets while wearing another man’s ring.”

“You don’t know me at all,” she shot back, so riled she couldn’t see straight. But who was she angry with? Mike Paul, for being honest? Or herself because she was drowning in doubt and lies and her own insecurities?

“Oh, but I do,” he said, moving toward her. ‘I’m the guy who knows you pick out the pink marshmallows in your Lucky Charms. I know you have an insane fear of spiders.” His hands cupped her face and held her so that she couldn’t move. Not that she could. She was frozen in place.

“I know that your eyes change colors when I’m inside you. When we’re so fucking close, nothing can tear us apart.” He paused. “Except you, Ivy. You’re the storm now. You and Lafferty and whatever this is between us is messy.”

The fact she could swallow was a miracle considering her throat was so damn tight. Her breaths fell in short, hard spurts, and she was dizzy. His hands fell from her face, and she was lucky she didn’t end up on the floor in a puddle of pathetic need and confusion.

He stepped back, and she finally exhaled. “What are you doing?”

“Cobi is on her way.”

“But—”

“This is me finally being man enough to do what’s right. Let me know when the storm ends, Wilkens because I’ll still be here.”

Mike Paul held her gaze for so long tears poked the corners of her eyes. Then, with a small nod, he turned and left her alone.

Chapter17

Sundays were usuallychill at Mike Paul’s place. He took care of the animals, caught up on paperwork, and organized his coming week. Then, he usually spent the afternoon on the sofa eating pizza, drinking beer, and watching football. Sometimes, he’d head to his parents for dinner or to Cobi’s place, but most of the time, he was on his own.

And up until recently, that was how he liked things. Calm.Predictable.

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