Page 50 of Fate's Unseen Shadow

“Never. I don’t believe in playing what-if games when no viable solutions exist. It’s pointless mental torture.”

“What do you mean?”

He stroked a hand down her hair. “I’ll give you an example. Hayley. If my mission hadn’t gone the way it did, if we hadn’t lost half our team, I would’ve still been deployed when she was taken. I wouldn’t have been there with Xavier to find her. Then, if Xavier hadn’t met Ryker when he did, we wouldn’t have gotten that video as quickly as we did to save her.” He twirled a strand of her hair. “That line of thought is unproductive. There’s no point in tormenting yourself about something that didn’t happen.”

“What do you mean by unproductive?”

“Saying ‘what if I wasn’t there’ doesn’t change anything I can control. But asking questions before the action is productive. What if Hayley’s captor was in the garage when we arrived? That’s a contingency plan. It’s another viable action that I could’ve taken. Simply saying ‘what if I was never there’ doesn’t help me. If it’s a change of plans and a productive conversation, I’ll talk about it. But a fatalistic attitude will get you killed if you’re constantly evaluating the past like that. Why ruminate if I don’t see how I can change the outcome? That’s what fate is to me. Or destiny. Whatever people call it.

“It sounds whimsical that we were fated to be together, but you can’t pick and choose when to apply fate. I can’t say, what ifwe never met? Or what if I didn’t turn you down the first time? Would Teddy be alive? Maybe. Would you and I have ended up like we are? Possibly. But would we have found those kids in time if I’d delayed those cases for yours? I don’t know. We can never take that path now.”

“Wow. I never thought of it that way. So finding you exactly when I needed you is sheer luck?”

“Yes. You’re lucky to have me.” He laughed, kissing the top of her head. “Go to sleep, Ella.”

Sleep? If she had been tired before, that feeling would have left the second they had lain down.

She wanted him.

Ella stroked his skin, contemplating her next move. For the last few years, it had been only Matteo. Casual. No stress. No feelings. It wasn’t even fun.

Shifting, she pulled herself a little higher to kiss his shoulder and then neck.

He gripped her thigh, dragging it up to his hip.

Ella kissed his jaw.

“Ella?” His voice held a warning tone she ignored.

She nipped at his edge of his ear before kissing down his neck. Propping herself up on her arm, she kissed up the other side, her body now fully pressed against his.

Damon tightened his fingers on the back of her shirt. “Stop playing.”

“Playing?” Amused, she sat up. “Sorry I didn’t make myself clear. I’m not playing.” She took her T-shirt off and dropped it on his face. “Is this any clearer,baby?”

Damon ripped the shirt away and threw it to the other side of the room. “Perfectly clear.” He yanked her back down, rolled over, and covered her lips with his.

The kiss was wild; he seemingly let go of the restraint he’d had at the bar. She attempted to participate, kiss him back like before. That proved pointless.

He grabbed her wrists and held them pinned to the bed above her head with one hand. With the other, he skimmed down her arm until he filled his palm with her breast. He took a deep breath, growling on the exhale. “You’re never allowed to wear a shirt again.”

15

Ella stretched out underneath him. “I agree to the no-shirt rule if you do this to me.”

“Damn.” Damon pushed her breast up, wishing he could see her. He felt her tight tip peek out from between his fingers and rubbed his tongue across it, and she moaned. He laughed softly as he switched to the other side. “I think I’ll stay right here the rest of the night.” He licked that tip before drawing it firmly between his lips.

She arched her back. “Please tell me you have a condom.”

He returned to the other side, trying to think through the haze her breasts put him in. “I do have a condom, but it’s not for you.”

“For the next girl due in your bed?” she tossed back, seeming irritated.

That humored him. There would be no one else in his bed but her.

“No,” he replied, kissing the valley between her breasts and back up to her neck. He wrapped his hand around her throat, fingers tangling with her pearl necklace as he tilted her head upand away. “And this better be the only bed you’re in.” He nipped at her ear. “I don’t share,” he whispered.

She gave into his dominance with a soft sigh as her thighs widened.

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