Page 35 of Blue Velvet

She adds another pause, sniffles, and visibly fights off another impending wave of tears. But her sad desperation soon wins over, shaking her body with violent sobs. Seeing her like this doesn’t give me anything. It doesn’t please me, it doesn’t arouse me. It fuckinghurtsto see her like this - and I hate myself for feeling this way. This isnothow it’s supposed to be, not at all.

“You know, I was actually looking forward to this job,” she whines. “I was scared, too. This is bigger than anything I ever signed up for before, so much bigger, but also so much more exciting. Iwantedthis to happen. Iwantedto be kidnapped. Iwantedto be someone’s possession. I wanted to be treated like fucking property. I wanted to be fucked like there’s no tomorrow, trained, and chained.”

Her watery eyes seek mine. “I wanted to see how much I could take. I wanted to be tested,really be tested. But I wanted it to be safe. And now...”

Her voice breaks as she succumbs to another crying fit. I hate the goddamn daggers that she’s throwing at my heart with this. She’s a fucking witch, and she’s killing me.

It’s as if my arm is moving on its own. I’m surprised that she doesn’t try to fight me off. Instead, she not only accepts the comfort I’m willing to offer her, but she actively seeks it. I pick her up in her awkward state, making use of the fact that my ragged hogtie allows her to kneel with her back only slightly bent backwards, and wrapping my arms around her as she sobs like a hurt child.

“Why didn’t you just buy me?” she utters tearfully. “You could’ve been my client. You didn’t have to kidnap me.”

I tighten my embrace around her, closing my eyes as I press her closer against my body.

“No, my toy,” I object in a low voice. “I had to.”

19

Ruby

I don’t understandwhy this is happening to me. And I don’t understand him.

Why is he doing this? Why is he being so gentle with me now? Is it my vulnerability that turns him on? Is this part of the thrill for him?

I don’t know what he has in store for me. Now that I know who he is - or rather who he isn’t - there’s nothing I can hope to expect from him, there’s nothing I can rely on. He could hurt me, abuse me all day long - he could kill me.

He could actually kill me.

Is that what he had in mind when he took me? True fear, true terror - followed by a true end so his deed never gets discovered?

“Are you going to kill me?” I ask him. My words are muffled as my face is pressed against his firm chest. His strong, muscular chest that I adored just a few days ago, when I refused to believe this is not what I thought it was.

“Not if I don’t have to,” he says. His words make my heart stutter with fear.

“How will you know if you have to?”

He doesn’t give me a reply, but instead he carefully pushes me away from him, making sure that I’m stable, kneeling next to him, before he brings his hands behind my back, looking over my shoulder as he fiddles with the knots around my wrists.

“What are you doing?” I ask.

“Using you,” he replies. “That’s what you’re here for after all.”

I take in a big gulp of air, scolding myself when I notice a subtle wave of arousal washing over me, warming my core and making my heart turn in somersaults. This is sick. Even I should know that this is the absolute worst moment, the absolute worst circumstance to be aroused by.

“What are you going to do?” I elaborate. “What’s going to happen?”

“Shut up, toy,” he hisses, finally loosening the knots pinching around my wrists.

He holds my arms in place, his hands replacing the rope, yet immobilizing me just as effectively.

“You don’t want to fight me, toy,” he warns hoarsely. “You’ll regret it.”

I’m paralyzed, unsure what to make of the thrilling heat that’s spreading throughout my body. Holy shit, I’m fucked-up.

“Do you understand?”

“Yes,” I hurry to reply.

His grip around my wrists tightens, and he bends my arms, causing me to groan in pain.

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