Page 23 of Now or Never

Hope you aren’t constipated anymore. Love, Herbert.

I unlocked my door and shoved it open. I wrapped one arm around the flowers and tightened my grip on the fruit basket in the other arm. I staggered in and put the flowers and the fruit basket on my kitchen counter. I sliced off a small chunk of pear and dropped it into Rex’s food bowl. Rex rushed out of his soup can, looked like he’d won the lottery when he spied the piece of pear, stuffed it into his cheek, and scurried back into his can. God bless Rex. I’d finally found a creature who appreciated free fruit.

I brought my messenger bag into the dining room, sat at the table, and opened my laptop. I went to YouTube and searched for Robin Hoodie. Bam. There he was. I scrolled down and pulled up the UPS truck video. It started with an aerial view of the homeless camp. It cut away from the aerial and picked up the truck approaching a collection of tents. Robin Hoodie got out from behind the wheel, opened the back door to the truck, and started pitching boxes out. Almost instantly the truck was surrounded by the homeless. They were ripping the boxes open and pulling out their contents. Cheers went up when someone got an iPad. More cheers for a North Facewinter jacket. I had to admit, it was mesmerizing. I couldn’t stop watching. I looked at a couple more Robin Hoodie videos after the UPS truck. Robin Hoodie always remained a shadowy figure. He never showed his face. He was always alone, but clearly he had a partner. Maybe he had a whole crew. He was wearing a GoPro, but there were times when there was a second camera angle. And someone was flying a drone. In one of the videos, gloved hands were opening packages that I presumed had been swiped from people’s porches. They were opened on a folding table that looked a lot like the ones in Kevin’s apartment. They were given close-ups and then repackaged in large boxes and dropped off at soup kitchen locations and small encampments. There was a whole box of kids’ toys that went to a family shelter. No one ever spoke in the videos but sometimes there was music.

Wow. I couldn’t think beyond that one word. Wow. I pushed back in my chair and took a moment to step away from the videos. It was almost impossible not to love Robin Hoodie. All those happy homeless people. All those desperate substance abusers. All those kids with new sneakers and toys. Then there were all those shadowy images of someone with Eugene’s build pitching boxes out to people. And there were all those photos I took of video equipment, empty cardboard boxes, drones, and GoPros in Kevin’s loft. Not to mention Eugene’s fingerprints on the UPS truck. Hard to believe that Eugene wasn’t Robin Hoodie. Not impossible, but difficult not to believe.

I called Connie. “Do you know about Robin Hoodie?” I asked her. “Have you seen the videos?”

“There are videos?”

“YouTube.”

“I don’t watch a lot of YouTube,” Connie said. “Only when I can’t figure something out. Like, how do I shut my iPhone off.”

“Let me talk to Lula.”

“Hey,” Lula said. “What’s up?”

“Robin Hoodie. Have you seen his videos on YouTube?”

“No. I watch the music videos and I like Jeff Goldblum and the kid who sells sneakers.”

“Take a look at Robin Hoodie on YouTube and call me back.”

Twenty minutes later I got the phone call.

“Holy crap,” Lula said.

“Do you remember when I had to bring in that ninety-three-year-old woman who was in assisted living? Everyone hated me.”

“Yeah, that was ugly. The other residents came after you with their canes and scooters,” Lula said.

“This could be worse.”

“I see what you’re saying,” Lula said. “This Robin Hoodie guy is a hero. He’s got his own YouTube channel. He’s a celebrity. Even people who think what he’s doing is wrong are still gonna be pissed off because he’s good watching and you’re gonna end all that. And the people who are in favor of the homeless and orphans and such are gonna look at you like you’re the sheriff of Nottingham carting the savior of the poor and downtrodden, Robin Hood, off to jail in chains. You’ll be lucky if you don’t get your apartment firebombed again.”

“Do you think Eugene is Robin Hoodie?”

“I guess it’s possible,” Lula said, “but it would be disappointing. I already got a fantasy going, and my fantasy Robin don’t look like Eugene.”

“Eugene’s mom expects him to be home for dinner, so I thought it would be a good time for us to make a capture.”

“I guess that would be okay,” Lula said. “I don’t have any dinner plans for tonight.”

“Mrs. Fleck said they always eat at six o’clock.”

“Are you going to try to snag him going in or going out?”

“I thought I’d go in while they’re eating. He doesn’t seem like the sort of person who would make a scene in front of his parents. I’ll meet you at the office at five thirty.”

I hung up and called Morelli. “What do you think of Robin Hoodie?” I asked him.

“Not much, but my mom and grandma love him.”

“Have you seen his videos?”

“A couple.”

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