Page 40 of Now or Never

“Yes.”

“If I could have a moment, I’d like to talk to you about your nephew Zoran.”

“Are you police? Newspaper? I’ve already talked to the police. I have nothing more to say.”

I gave him my card. “I know this is a bad time, but Zoran missed his court date. If he doesn’t reschedule, he’ll be considered a felon.”

“Is that a problem?”

“It’s reason to arrest him.”

“The police told me that Zoran is aperson of interestin the laundromat tragedy,” Sergei said. “I’m sure you already know this.”

“I knew there was a murder. You’re his uncle, and he works for you. I thought he might have come here to get away from everything.”

“Not on a Wednesday,” Sergei said. “Everybody knows we have pot roast on Wednesday.” He cut his eyes in the direction of the kitchen. “My wife burns it black. She says it makes dark gravy that way.” He sipped his whiskey. “She’s a terrible cook.”

“Do you know where I might find Zoran?”

“No. He’s a loner. Doesn’t share a lot, but he’s a good man and an excellent employee. Keeps the laundromat clean and the machines in order. He’s been my manager for almost six years. I’m sure he had nothing to do with what happened to that woman.”

I knew he had everything to do with what happened tothat woman, but I wasn’t going to argue with a man who had fangs. “If you happen to talk to Zoran, let him know that I’m available to help him reschedule. It would be in his own best interest.”

I left Sergei to deal with his charred pot roast, and I headed home. I had a brief moment when I considered stopping at Bruno’s house, but I decided against it. Better to deal with Bruno’s office henchmen than his trigger-happy wife.

I walked into my apartment and found Herbert in my kitchen.

“Hi,” he said. “I bet you’re surprised to see me here. I didn’t call you ahead or anything because I wanted to surprise you. You’re surprised, right? Wait until you see what I did!”

“Oh jeez. Don’t tell me you did something.”

“Not all by myself. I could have done it by myself, but it would have taken longer, and I thought you would want to have it done right away. If it was me, that’s what I’d want. I’m not good at waiting to get things done. It’s not like I’m impatient or anything, it’s just that I’m not a procrastinator. I only allow myself to have good qualities. Nicky and Walter helped me. They just left. If you’d gotten home fifteen minutes sooner, you could have met them.”

“What did you do?”

“I painted your apartment. You can tell, right? There aren’t any more black fire smudge marks. They were hard to cover but we did it. Your bedroom is Sea Salt. It’s the most calming bedroom color. The rest of the apartment is a cream with a hint of yellow. It’s a neutral but it’s sunny during the day and cozy at night. That’s what it said in the advertisement in the paint store.”

I walked into the living room. It was transformed. “Wow,” I said. “I can’t believe you did this. It’s beautiful.”

“We didn’t get paint on any of your furniture either. And the new-paint smell masks the campfire smell. I hope you weren’t attached to the campfire smell. We used water-based paint, but it still has a little new-paint smell to it. I like the new-paint smell, but I understand that it’s not everyone’s favorite.”

I walked into the bedroom. Herbert was right about the calming effect. It was a very peaceful, restful color.

“Now that we’re in your bedroom maybe you’ll have sex with me,” Herbert said. “I’m very good at it. I’ve read a lot ofbooks and watched a lot of videos and I’ve had some hands-on experience, if you’ll excuse the pun. I’m especially popular with older women.”

“It was nice of you to paint my apartment, but I’m not having sex with you. Ever.”

“Ever is a long time. I won’t hold you to ever. And you’ll feel different when the carpet arrives.”

“Carpet?”

“Don’t worry, I’ll be here to accept delivery tomorrow and check it all out. You can be here too, if you want, but I know you have work to do. My work hours are flexible. Sometimes I work in the morning and sometimes I work in the afternoon and sometimes I work at night. You’ll like the carpet. It’s a nice dense-weave poly in a neutral color. I got a good deal on a bulk roll. There’s enough for your whole apartment. I even walked on a sample with my bare feet to make sure it felt good. Some carpets can be scratchy. I don’t like those carpets.”

“How are you getting into my apartment?”

“You left your door open.”

“My door was locked when I left.”

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