Page 19 of On Your Knees

Chapter 10

Evangelina

“Have fun with Mommy,” Christopher says to Nate as he kisses the top of his head. He hands Nate his little dinosaur backpack and Nate rushes on little feet to where I stand at the edge of the driveway next to my car.

I don’t have the energy to fight with Christopher today. After working until almost two am, and then having the hardest time falling asleep, I’m a bit tired today.

I worried Christopher would find some way to screw up my visitation this weekend. “I’ll see you Sunday at six.” Which is our usual time.

“Actually can we switch in the morning? I have a meeting that’s going to run late, so it’d be easier.”

“I had wanted to take Nate to church with me.”

Christopher moves closer so we’re not shouting across his lawn. He raises a brow. “Church?”

I nod. “Yes, I’ve joined a church and wanted to take Nate.”

Christopher laughs harder now. “You at church? Now this I gotta see.”

I don’t say anything more. I’ve never been the type of person who hates on religion. I believe in good and evil. And Christopher is evil.

I could sit here and fight with him about how the change in time completely cuts into my time with my son, but what’s the use? He’s going to win no matter what I say, so instead I smile. “Sure, the morning’s fine.”

My lawyer once told me to pick my battles. Christopher fights me on everything and he knows exactly how to push my buttons. He’s testing me. Trying my patience. Until one day I snap. Well, I won’t give him that satisfaction. With my new job I’ll be able to get my son sooner rather than later.

“I love you,” I say as I kneel down to give my son a hug. It’s been so long since I’ve had this child in my arms. Tears spring to my eyes as his little arms wrap around my neck.

“I missed you, Mommy.”

“I missed you too.” I stand to my full size. “Ready to go have fun?”

He smiles wide, his green eyes shining up at me. “Yes, I’m ready.”

I help him into the booster in the backseat, and place his dino backpack on the seat beside him. “How was school today?” I askhim, remembering when I used to be the one who picked him up daily from childcare. “You still loving kindergarten?”

He nods. “Miss Nottingham says I’m a good student.”

“I know she does.” I start the car and pull out of Christopher’s driveway. “Wave goodbye to Daddy.”

In the rearview I watch as Nate waves to his father who is already barking away into his cell phone and hasn’t even noticed we’re pulling away.

Daddy of the year award there.

Who cares? Maybe one day Nate can see his father for what he truly is. A badbadman.

I head across town, taking Nate to my little apartment. After I’ve unpacked him and given him a light dinner, we sit in the living room, snuggled up on the couch together.

“What did you want to do tomorrow?” I ask him asPaw Patrolplays lightly in the background.

“Park?”

I smile. “Yes, we can do the park. And maybe if you’re good we can have ice cream for dessert.”

He perks up, sitting up straighter on the couch. “Can we have ice cream right now?”

I glance at my phone, checking the time. It’s not that late. “Actually, yes we can.” If Nate lived with me full time I probably wouldn’t give him ice cream after dinner every night, but I want our time together to be special and meaningful. Something he won’t ever forget.

So, we bound from the couch, and he heads into the kitchen, waiting for me to get the ice cream out of the fridge, but I have another surprise for him.

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