Page 59 of Grump and Grumpier

“From what Marissa tells me, you’re one to talk. Where have you been spendingyournights?”

“I’ve been spending most of them here, but I have been having occasional sleepovers.”

“If anyone’s curious, I’ve been spending all my nights right here at home,” Marissa says. “Just me with no men.”

Callie leans over to pull Marissa into a sympathetic side hug. “I was sure someone would snap you up as soon as you broke up with Todd.”

“I’ve had opportunities. I guess I’ve been picky.”

“Nothing wrong with that,” I tell her.

The three of us catch up as we eat. Callie fills us in on how things are going with Miles and Max, as Marissa prompts her with more questions. I guess I’m quieter than usual, because when things go silent right after I take a bite of muffin, I look up to find both of them staring at me.

One of my cheeks is full, so I quickly chew and swallow before asking, “What?”

“Something’s going on with you …what is it?” Callie accuses.

“What do you mean?”

“You seem like you’re somewhere else.”

If I retrace my thinking, I guess I have been half preoccupied with thoughts of Derek and Jansen, even though I’ve been following the conversation, too. “Guilty, I guess.”

“Is everything okay?” Marissa asks.

“Yeah … everything’s good.” I pick up my spoon and swirl it mindlessly through the dollop of sour cream that still tops my chili as I gather my thoughts. “I’m just getting in too deep, I guess.”

Callie cocks her head. “How so?”

“My relationship with my bosses has always been all about sex, right from the start, and that was fine with me. They were both so grumpy all the time, I never imagined wanting anything more than that from them, and the sex has been so good, it’s more than enough.”

“We get it,” Marissa says, playfully sounding exhausted. “You’re having tons and tons of good sex. Move the story along.”

“Sorry, I promise to let you talk endlessly about sex as soon as you find the right guy.”

Still grinning, she makes an impatient gesture with her hand. “So what’s gone wrong? You’ve fallen for them?”

“I think I might have. They’ve shown me different sides of themselves. There’s depth there, and even though they’re still sometimes grouchy, I’ve learned where it stems from, and I find myself caring about them far more than I should.”

Marissa and Callie nod at this, unsurprised.

“My attraction for them has moved far beyond the physical, and I’m going to get hurt. Last night, it hit me that I’m falling in love with them—maybe I already am in love.”

I expect one of them to say something, and when they don’t, I keep talking, or rather, thinking out loud. “It’s a good thing it’s almost time for me to leave Community Bean, before I get in even deeper, though I’m afraid I’m already in too deep. I feel so much for Derek and Jansen, even though I know they didn’t mean for me to bring feelings into it.”

“What makes you think that?” Callie asks.

“It’s just about sex. No attachment. We don’t talkabout the future. We don’t even go out in public together since the relationship is a secret.”

Marissa has stopped eating and turned her full attention on me. “Have you talked to them about how you feel?”

“No … I just think it was silly of me to let my heart get involved.”

“Maybe things have evolved for them, too,” Callie says.

I frown as I struggle to imagine how I’d bring it up, or how the conversation would go.

“You’re usually so optimistic about things,” Marissa says. “Are you afraid of getting hurt?”

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