Page 148 of Brazen Mistakes

Right now, I’m closer to her than I’ve ever been to anyone. And as shitty as it is to even admit in my head, closer to her than I ever thought I would be with any woman. And instead of freaking out like I’d figured I would if I ever had sex, I just feel like I’ve turned into a contented, boneless cat.

Eventually, I’m able to open my eyes, and the motion stirs Clara from where she was, nose pressed against my skin, limbs spiraled around me. “Hey, handsome,” she says, running one hand down the side of my face as she checks on me, eyes bright, happy, sated.

I nuzzle into her hand, not ready for this moment to pass. Instead of answering, I kiss her lightly, hoping that I can somehow say thank you without actually having to say such a stupid thing out loud. But I mean it. This could have been a night I looked back on with embarrassment. Instead, she made it good for both of us. Better than good. Amazing.

I feel amazing. I hope she does too.

She shifts her hips and I hiss, the change in position lighting up nerves in such a way that I can’t tell if it feels good or terrible. Good seems likely. Either way, she freezes. “Sorry, my hip’s cramping. But this is nice, so we can stay like this as long as you want. If you want, that is. Whatever you want. Or need. We’ll do that.”

Grinning, I press a kiss to her lips again to stop her from freaking out further, then pull out, the friction leaving me panting, my dick debating getting hard again.

Then I’m stuck, transfixed by what happens next, my cum slowly pooling onto the sheets. Part of me knows that watching silently is creepy and weird, but I can’t help myself.

I feel Clara’s eyes on me, and she spreads her knees wider, offering me exactly what I inexplicably want.

I did that. To her. Me.

How dumb that I care, but there it is. I glance at her, and she’s watching me, something that looks like a dare on her face. So I take it, plunging two fingers into the mess, listeningto her groan as I coax her to a second orgasm, the slickness against my skin created by the two of us. Together.

She shatters quickly, moaning and quaking around my fingers, and then she does the hottest and most inexplicable thing. As I pull out my fingers, she sits up, catching my wrist. Then staring me in the eye, she sucks both of my fingers into her mouth, licking them clean.

I shudder, but I stay half hard, my body apparently needing a break after my best ever orgasm.

When she shifts farther, her tongue sliding along the crease of my lips, I let her in, the combined taste of us making my heart race. “Clara,” I mutter, everything so much, so big, so amazing.

She ducks her head into my neck. “Was that too much? Shoot. It was too much, wasn’t it?”

Awkwardly, I scoop her up and knee walk with her to the other side of the bed, away from the sticky puddle we just made. “Perfect, sugar. You’re perfect.”

She just burrows deeper. “Not perfect. I don’t want to be perfect. Perfect fucked me up.”

“Amazing, then.”

“Amazing I can live with.”

There are probably better words. Fancier ones. But amazing is close enough. So fucking amazing.

Chapter 53

Clara

RJ stays quiet, holding me loosely in his arms, enveloping me in his citrus and sage scent. My mind wants to spiral, to tell me everything I did right or wrong in the last hour, all the ways I probably ruined his first time, all the ways I could have eased him into this. But then I remind myself that while he’s been quiet, he gave me a “perfect,” and an “amazing,” so I shouldn’t worry. Not unless I have a reason.

Do I have a reason?

Needing something to occupy my brain, I break the silence. “What’s the story behind your back tattoo?”

An unexpected laugh escapes him. “You’re not the only one who’s had stupid fun with Jansen. After our first big job last year, he talked me into spending some of my portion on this tattoo. Honestly, I don’t know how he managed it, but within two weeks, I had a stylized version of the Hyrule shield on myback, coupled with a teleportation crystal from FF and the Assassins Creed logo.”

I must look as confused as I feel, and his lips give a rueful twist. “Hyrule is the magic world from Zelda, one of many video game franchises that got me through my preteen and teenage years. FF is short for Final Fantasy, an MMORPG…er, an online game where I found my first good friends, and Assassins Creed is another video game I played a bunch. Basically, it’s the nerdiest tattoo anyone could have gotten.”

“Roll over,” I say a second before I realize how demanding it sounds, but he does, and I inspect his back for the first time in full light without distractions. “But it’s so pretty.” I trace a wing of what must be the emblem of the shield, grinning as his muscles twitch under my touch.

“The artist Jansen knew was amazing. Even Walker was impressed, although he was pissed he had nothing to do with the design.”

I trace the lines of the art for a while, knowing even with my limited understanding of art that this is a good tattoo. I never would have guessed it was a bunch of nerdy pop culture references. It looks meaningful and aesthetic. But then I find a patch of darker skin, and when I brush my fingers over that, RJ hisses in a breath.

“Are you hurt?” I ask, my suppressed panic immediately spiking.

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