Page 73 of Brazen Deceits

Damn best friends and their uncanny ability to see what you’re trying to hide. “I haven’t decided against the FBI. I just, I don’t know. I’m wondering what else is out there.”

“There’s an entire world out there, and as many ways to exist in it as there are bodies on the planet, Clara. You’re smart. You’ll figure out where that big brain of yours belongs.”

“What about if my brain and heart disagree?”

She looks at me, really looks at me. “Only you can decide what fits. No one else. What makes your heart sing? What makes your brain excited to do the next thing? Where do those two intersect? That’s where you belong. And it might change. But that’s how you calibrate.”

I bend down, giving my best friend the biggest hug. “How did you get so wise?”

“I listened at too many doors as a little kid.”

I laugh, scooping up my bag and my Coke, heading to the door. It would be just like Trips to drive over to pick me up, then leave because I wasn’t waiting at the door for him. “Love you.”

“Love you, too. Fill me in later?”

Saluting, I head down to wait for Trips, knowing that whatever happens next, it won’t be nearly as chill as my night so far.

Chapter 32

Trips

Why did I take her out to eat? What kind of idiot doesn’t realize it’s Friday night and that dinner out on a Friday with a girl you’re into is at leastmostlya date?

I’m that kind of idiot.

Clara is looking over the menu at the Irish pub I stopped at between Emma’s apartment and our house. Why did I fucking stop? Because I was hungry, and she said she was too.

She tucks a curl behind her ear, and I have to look away, staring at the half-full bar. In a few hours, it’ll be full of TAs drinking shots and pretending they’re too mature for a house party. But half of them will have to be carried home at the end of the night, so I fail to see any difference.

“Do you want a beer or something?” I ask, my mouth jumping ahead of my brain. Because, you know, adding drinking to this Friday night dinner really communicates this isn’t a date. Smooth, Trips.

She shakes her head before she digs into her wallet, pulling out her ID. “I guess I can now, can’t I?”

Walker must have finished up her fake, not that he’s said anything to me about it. He’s cagier than ever, and I know exactly who to blame—this fucking magnet that crashed into our well-calibrated machine.

The waiter comes by, and I order an Irish whiskey while she gets a whiskey ginger. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen her drink the same thing more than once. Apparently, she likes her drinks like she likes her men: selected to match her moods, then tossed aside.

With that bitter comparison stuck in my mind, I order some pub pretzels, too. I wasn’t kidding about being hungry.

And of fucking course, because my mind has decided to knock me as low as possible once that fucking siren sits across from me, it flashes to Jansen’s fucking grin, asking me about Clara giving me head.

No, no, no. I’m not daydreaming that my half-assed attempt at sexting had gone a different direction. Not right now. I’m here for a reason.

I fold up my menu, drawing her attention to me. “So I heard from RJ and Walker about how you handled Jasmine in Chicago.”

Clara tilts her head, and I know she’s trying to get a read on me. I don’t know ifsheknows that’s what she’s doing, as I’m pretty sure it’s instinct for her, but I lock down all the shit in my head, forcing all those damn emotions deeper.

“What did you hear?” She pulls on her sleeves, a new nervous gesture she’s picked up now that it’s almost winter.

“That you played the part of badass bitch with grace and aplomb.”

A smile twists her lips. “And isn’t that a good thing?”

I shrug. “I have to consider the sources.”

“You don’t believe them?”

My heart thunders. The problem is that I do fucking believe them, and now I’m stuck with our main fence thinking a girl who isn’t even on the team is the one calling the shots. And I don’t know of a way to fix that without our team looking unstable and a bad bet for bigger gigs. Instead of saying all that, though, I shrug. “Consider tonight an interview.”