Page 26 of Make Room for Love

No more idle daydreaming. No more thinking about how if Mira lived with her ashergirlfriend, she would treat Mira like a princess, protecting her and doting on her and giving her everything she wanted and needed. Isabel dug her fingernailsinto her palms. Someone was going to do all that for Mira someday, if there was any fairness in the world, and it was not going to be Isabel.

“It’s all right,” Mira said. “I told you it wasn’t really about you.” She hesitated. “Could I ask you something?”

“Go ahead.”

“When we met, you said you needed a roommate to cover rent, or else you couldn’t afford to live here anymore. So when you offered— To be honest, it’s obvious that you’re already undercharging me for the room. So I don’t understand how you could have offered me an even bigger discount. I thought you didn’t want a roommate in the first place.”

Mira was suspicious and trying to be polite. Isabel said, “It’s true. I wasn’t lying when I told you that. It’s nothing personal, I just meant…”

Mira smiled thinly. “It’s okay. I don’t think many people have roommates solely for the sake of it.”

“I didn’t know how I would afford it.” Isabel shrugged. “I wasn’t really thinking. I just had the idea. I’m close to spending my whole paycheck every month, but I could have used some of my savings.”

“Really?” Mira said immediately. Then she winced. “I’m sorry. Please don’t answer that. I don’t mean to pry.”

Mira’s surprise was understandable. Isabel obviously wasn’t living it up. “I help my parents and grandmother with their mortgage payments, and my little sister’s wedding is coming up. So it’s a little tight right now.” The truth was that she’d set some money aside for Grace, but as long as Grace wasn’t speaking to her, there was no way for Isabel to offer.

“You’re paying for your parents’andyour grandparents’ houses?”

“My mom’s mom lives with my parents. Alexa and I saved enough for the down payment for the house, and the plan wasthat we’d both help them with the mortgage payments.” There was a deep well of pain underneath those simple facts. Isabel couldn’t fall in, not right now.

Mira’s gaze was gentle. “It sounds like you’re a really good daughter. And sister.”

Hearing that from Mira meant more than it should. Isabel’s chest ached. She wanted to believe those words. She wasn’t sure if she could.

Mira took a bite of her sandwich, letting Isabel remain in her silence. “Oh, it’s good,” Mira said. “Thanks for tipping me off about this cart. I’ll have to come back.”

Isabel smiled, the weight of grief lifting slightly. “No problem.” After what Mira had told her today, it was nice to see her enjoying something, no matter how small. Even if Mira’s happiness wasn’t any of Isabel’s business.

They ate in silence for a few minutes. Then Mira said, “I appreciate you explaining that to me.”

“Explaining what?”

“When you offered to help me with rent, I didn’t understand what was happening. I didn’t know why you were offering, or if there was a catch, or…” Her eyes went wide. “I’m not comparing you to Dylan. That’s not what I meant.”

Mira had no idea. Isabel swallowed her guilt. “Don’t worry about it.”

“Well, I want to say that I’m grateful I ended up here. I really am. It’s been so nice to live somewhere where I can have some space to myself. Not just having my own room, but actually having freedom again. I’d forgotten what that was like.”

Isabel’s guilt rose again, stronger than ever. Reina must have felt just as free after she left, even though she’d been considerate enough to not say it outright. They were on good terms, in theory. Reina occasionally texted her photos of the wide-open Californian sky.

“I’m glad,” Isabel said. She meant it. Mira deserved freedom, and that was far better than anything Isabel could give her.

It was sheer bad luck: The woman she’d run into who’d desperately needed a spare room was too beautiful and too hard to resist. And it was even worse luck that Mira was lovely and brave, that she asked Isabel questions and listened as though she cared, that she constantly tempted Isabel to let her defenses down.

This was torture. And there were two more months of this. Maybe she could give Mira the last month for free, to help her move out earlier. Isabel could find enough money to cover that.

Mira flashed her a sweet, conciliatory smile. If Isabel’s heart hadn’t already been crushed, the curve of Mira’s mouth and the crinkling around her eyes would have done it. “When you helped me that night at the club, did you also do that without thinking?” Mira asked. “You were fast.”

“I guess so.” Isabel hadn’t needed to think. She’d seen a man yelling at a woman who was clearly afraid. “I don’t regret it.”

“I could use more of that. Just doing things without overthinking, I mean.”

Isabel shrugged. “It doesn’t always work out.”

“Yeah, you ended up with a roommate. No good deed goes unpunished.”

Isabel laughed despite the dull, heavy pain in her chest. “I didn’t mean it like that. Hey, seriously, it’s been good,” she added. Mira didn’t owe her anything. She had to be sure that Mira knew.

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