Page 116 of Escaping Our Reality

Tears spring to her eyes. She quickly wipes them away, refusing to let me see them. “Don’t you dare say that. You didn’t ruin my life. You saved my life.”

It’s like I’m finally seeing clearly. Finally gaining clarity.

I’m the bad guy.

Here, I spent all this time worrying about her safety, worrying about her getting hurt. And I’m the one who has been hurting her all along. I’ve taken a beautiful songbird and captured her in a tarnished and used cage. I’ve plucked the sun from the sky and shoved it in a deep cave.

She’s young. I took advantage of her. She’s doesn’t know what she wants.

Shit.

She’s only eighteen. Seventeen when I met her! What the hell was I thinking. Eighteen may be an adult in the eyes of the law, but she’s just a child. I was fooling myself every time I said she was the most mature person I ever met. It was just an excuse. An excuse to keep her with me.

I’m the bad guy.

It’s time for me to be the good guy for once. It’s time for me to save her life.

If I really love her, I will let her go. I will let her soar to her potential. Soar into the skies.

I can’t keep her weighted down in the mud with me. Not if I love her.

And I do. I love her more than life itself.

I meant what I said. Never before. Never after. And I’m okay with that. I hadthis.

This gift. This gift of time with her.

I don’t ever need to love again. This love is great enough to last me until I die.

But she’s young. In ten years, she won’t even remember my name. She’ll love again.

I turn around, reaching for my shirt. “Grab your stuff, Lulu. I’m taking you home. I need some space.”

“No, I’m not going anywhere.”

I casually snuff out the fire in the firepit, casting us into darkness. Grabbing a battery lantern, I flip the switch. “Yes, you are. I said I need some space. I can’t look at you right now.”

It’s true. I can’t. Because when I look at her, I want to fall to my knees and beg her to never leave me.

But that’s me being the bad guy again. Ruining her life.

She begrudgingly follows me to the truck. I’m in a daze. A walking zombie. I’m reaching for the door handle to the driver-side door when she pushes me back. Not anticipating it, I stumble. She jumps behind the steering wheel.

“You’ve had too many beers, I’ll drive myself. You can come pick up the truck tomorrow. We can talk then. Get Harlan to drive you. Maybe sleeping in the woods by yourself will bring you to your senses.”

She slams the door in my face and drives away.

My Lulu drives away. Taking my heart with her.

Chapter 47

ELLA

Fourteen days.

Two weeks.

I haven’t seen or talked to Ry in two whole weeks.

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