Page 95 of Finding Our Reality

“We are still waiting on the DNA test to confirm that it’s Carrie’s DNA on the pregnancy test, but it’s safe to assume it was hers.”

“Who? Who got her pregnant?”

Lulu squares her shoulders and stares into his eyes. “Well, I was hoping you could tell me.”

“Me? You think it was me?” His eyebrows lift so high, they disappear into his hairline.

“Carrie didn’t share the intimate details of y’all’s relationship with me all that much. She thought I was too young. But I do know that y’all were sexually active. Very, very active from what I remember.”

“Of course, we were. We were young and in love. But we broke up months before she disappeared. And we always used protection. Always. She said your parents would go completelyballistic if she ever came home pregnant, said they would disown her.”

Lulu stirs uncomfortably in her chair and accidentally knocks her notebook and pen to the floor. She nervously fumbles to pick them up.

I press on, not wanting to lose the momentum. “And you didn’t share any time together after the breakup? A lonely night? A drunken party?”

“No, of course not. I was staying firm to my ultimatum that she had to stop selling and get clean before we could get back together. It hurt not being with her. It hurt like hell, but I wanted her to know how serious I was.”

Lulu discreetly reaches across and gives my knee a little squeeze, letting me know she’s back in the right mindset. “What if the pregnancy test was old? Did y’all ever experience a pregnancy scare during y’all’s relationship?”

Caleb sits back in his chair, rubbing his fingers across his chin in thought. Spinning around, he grabs a framed photo from the windowsill behind him. He hands it over to Lulu. It’s a framed picture of him with his wife and children standing on a rocky beach. “That’s my wife, Amelia, and our children.”

Lulu smiles, nodding. “You have a beautiful family, Caleb. You look happy.”

“I am happy. Trust me, after Carrie went missing, I didn’t think I would ever be happy again. I met Amelia during my very first week in Atlanta. Falling in love with her came as a surprise. I always thought there was one person for everyone on this earth. I knew without a doubt that Carrie was mine. She was my forever. And just like that, she was gone. I couldn’t believe how lucky I was to find love like that twice in my life. Amelia knows all about Carrie. She knows how much I loved your sister. She’s never asked me to choose. Not once. She’s never asked me to pick who I love more—her or Carrie. Amelia has this,” hechuckles, trying to grasp the right word, “amazing grace about her. She knows that love isn’t linear. It’s not a straight line. It’s a circle. And she knows that she and Carrie fit into the exact same circle.”

Lulu lowers her voice, whispering. “That’s great, Caleb. It doesn’t answer my question, though.” She gently places the frame on his desk.

He points to the image of his family. “We adopted our son when he was two years old. We adopted our daughter when she was just five weeks old.”

She cocks her head to the side, thinking. “Caleb? What are you saying?”

“I can’t have biological children, Ella. I have an autoimmune disease that makes me infertile. I didn’t know it when Carrie and I were together, but the doctors say I’ve most likely been infertile since puberty.”

Shit. I wasn’t expecting that.

“Oh, Caleb, I’m so sorry.”

He shrugs, clearly having come to terms with his situation long ago. “Don’t be. I couldn’t imagine my family being any different. My children are amazing.” He leans forward, wrapping his hand around Lulu’s. “But if Carrie was pregnant when she went missing, it wasn’t because of me. And I know without a doubt that she wouldn’t have been pregnant before our breakup. Carrie would have never cheated on me. Never. We loved each other. Plus, she never wanted to be like your father.”

Lulu nods. Turning to me, she holds out the last picture. She can’t do it. She can’t show it to him. She wants me to do it.

Of course, I will. I’d crawl through fire for this woman.

“We have one last picture to show you, Caleb,” I say. “Now that we know about your medical condition and your history with Carrie, it may provide some context to support the idea that Carrie was pregnant at the time of her disappearance.”

Caleb glances back and forth between me and Lulu. “Okay.” The trepidation in his voice is palpable.

“It’s disturbing and graphic. It’s hard to look at, but I need you to focus on the man in the picture. Tell us if anything about him is familiar.” Not giving him the chance to reconsider, I put the photograph in Caleb’s hands.

He loses it. Completely loses it.

He’s seeing the woman he loved—still loves—getting raped. If it were me? Well, let’s just say that hell itself wouldn’t even be a competition for my anger if something like that happened to My Lulu.

He cries. He screams. He paces.

It’s one of the most intimate and intense experiences I’ve ever been forced to watch. I turn off the camera on my vest, giving him some modicum of privacy.

His secretary rushes in to check on him. Not once, not twice, but three times. Each time, quietly closing the door without saying anything. By the third time, she’s even crying with him—for him—even though, she has no clue what’s happening.

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