Page 43 of Finding Our Reality

Especially after what I already hid from them.

“It’s complicated to see past the cobwebs. I’m so angry with him. I don’t know if I’ll ever stop being angry. Sometimes just being in the same room with him makes me wanna scream and cry and punch him in the face.”

“And other times?”

“Other times…” My voice trails off in thought. I close my eyes, picturing Ry’s sexy smile, imagining what it would feel liketo have his muscular arms wrap me in a hug. His frame is larger now than it was back then. Firmer. Solid. Masculine and mature. What would it feel like to be pressed against him? With nothing separating us but a thin sheen of sweat. “Other times, and don’t get me wrong, it’s only a small—very small—portion of the time, but I feel like I finally found my best friend again, the person who makes living life better.”

“Have you gotten any closure, any clarity?” she asks.

I kiss my baby cousin’s nose, making him yawn. “I don’t think I’ll ever get closure.”

“Well, you definitely won’t if you never tell him.”

***

“So, Caleb’s secretary refused to give me his cell phone number or personal email address. But she did talk to him, told him I was trying to get ahold of him. He told her to schedule me on his calendar for the first day he’s back in the office.”

Ry opens a fresh bottle of water and sets it in front of me. “So, he’s working a six-month stint out of the country?”

I nod. “Sweden. He and his family left mid-December. They’ll be back in Atlanta in June. He’s taking a week off work and then he’ll be starting back at the local office. We can meet with him then. He doesn’t do social media, his wife does. I could reach out to him that way, but I really think we need to have the conversation with him in person and not over the phone, from half a world away.”

I wait for him to ask if I’ll even be around in June. He completely bypasses that comment. “Yeah, asking someone if they got their ex-girlfriend pregnant before she mysteriously disappeared is probably something best to do in person. What did you tell the secretary?”

“Just that he and my sister were best friends for many years, and I am working on a book about her and wanted to interview him. See him again.”

Ry licks his perfectly brown-pink lips, causing a flutter in my stomach. “A book? Is that part real?”

“Maybe one day.” I shrug. “I’d love to write in-depth about a case. They say to write about what you know. There’s nothing I know more about than my sister. Plus, it’s not like I can write about one of my hired cases. I have standard language in my contract that says I will not pursue any outside activity from anything I’m hired to work on.”

He stares into my eyes, causing me to sit up straighter. “Well,” his voice purrs over his words, “let’s hope we can give the book a proper ending. Closure.”

Closure. There’s that damn word again.

Focusing back on my computer screen, I ask, “Any luck in finding Tyler, Holly, or James.”

“I’ve got the information on Holly, figured we could meet with her tomorrow. Based on what I’ve read, I’m thinking a surprise visit while her kids are at school may be the best route. I’m still waiting on address information for Tyler and a contact phone number for James. He lives in Dallas now, works in accounting at a big oil office.”

“And Christina knows we’re coming today?”

“Yeah, she seems to be in a really good place. Turned her life around. She married several years ago, and her husband owns an insurance company.”

“That’s good. Let’s just hope she’s willing to be forthcoming.”

Ry leans back in his chair. “Meaning?”

I stare into his pale green eyes. “Maybe she hasn’t told her husband all the gory details about her past. Most husbands don’t exactly enjoy hearing about their wife’s past indiscretions.”

His voice lowers to a whisper. “Did Hudson hear about yours?”

The blood stops circulating in my body. Even at my angriest, I would never refer to Ry as an indiscretion. He used to be my everything. Making love to him was never a poor choice. I had no choice. If I wanted to keep breathing, I had to be with him.

At least, that’s the way it felt.

Hindsight could call it misguided, I guess. He left me. Obviously, I was freakin’ misguided.

My voice chokes in my throat. “I never talked to Hudson about you.”

“Never? He didn’t ask?”

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