Page 15 of Always on My Mind

After unlocking the past lives with Lila, the memories came to Tessa more frequently, especially when she was sleeping. She had vivid dreams of their previous times together, and each time Jamie ran away. Only the first time did they escape together. Centuries later, and Jamie was still afraid.

“Tessa,” she said, voice hushed. “Please, I want to talk.”

“Well, I don’t,” Tessa shot back, shaking the last few crisps into the bowl. Then she turned on her heel and swept back into the kitchen to throw it away, but Jamie was behind her like a shadow.

“I don’t know why you’re acting this way. You’re the one who broke my heart, not the other way around.”

Tessa whipped around so fast, she shocked herself at staying upright. “That’s not true, and you fucking know it. I may have ended the relationship, but I wasnot—”

“Knew that’d get you going.”

“Fuck off,” Tessa huffed out, already imagining slapping the satisfied smirk off Jamie’s gorgeous face.

“Tess, please. With one of my teammates living with you, I’m sure we’ll be seeing more of each other. Can’t we clear the air?”

Tessa’s first instinct was to ask her what air there was to clear. They’d said everything they needed to say three years ago, hadn’t they? But at the pleading look in Jamie’s eyes, her heart softened.

“Fine,” she said. “Grab a bin bag. It’ll make it look like you’re helping me.”

“Thank you.”

They each grabbed a bag and headed toward the front door.

“Jamie!” Niamh called over the sound of “Spice Up Your Life.” “You don’t have to clean, you’re a guest!”

“It’s no problem!” Jamie replied. “I enjoy helping!”

Niamh shrugged and returned to dancing with Sofia.

Tessa didn’t speak the whole way down the hall toward the outside of the building. She wasn’t sure if there was too much on her heart or nothing at all. She hadn’t even thought about Jamie lately until a few months ago when she was viewing an estate home with her new friend, Laci Miller. Or Laci Frawley now since she’d married the Stanmore men’s goalkeeper, Jordan. Laci had been worried about her relationship with Jordan at the time, and Tessa had shared some experiences with Jamie to commiserate. Out of respect, she had not given Jamie’s name, so there was still no one outside of them, Billie, and Tessa’s family who knew that they were ever a couple.

They reached the wheelie bins outside, and Jamie lifted the lid to swing her bag in, and she held it open for Tessa, who followed suit.

“Honestly, I’m surprised it took me cornering you to notice me,” Jamie said. “I’ve been here for nearly an hour.”

“Sorry, I could hardly see around that massive closet you’re in.”

“How long have you been sitting on that one?”

“Three years.”

Jamie deflated. Silence fell between them, and Tessa’s rage bubbled up through her chest. How dare Jamie waltz into her life as if they hadn’t ripped each other apart. How dare she show up at her house and surprise her this way. How dare she disrupt the carefully created peace Tessa had gotten herself.

“How’ve you been?” Jamie asked.

“Oh, y’know, grand so,” Tessa replied with sarcasm. Then she scowled. “Are we gonna be talking pure shite all evening or are you gonna tell me why you’re here?”

Jamie heaved a sigh and dropped her gaze, her eyes seeming to trace the white painted lines on the street as she considered her words.

“I miss you,” she finally said.

Nostrils flared, Tessa raised herself to her full height. “Fuck you.”

Jamie’s eyes locked onto her gaze. “I know it’s not nearly a good enough reason to come barreling back into your life like this, but it’s the truth. I’ve missed you since the moment I walked out of your flat three years ago. I’ve missed you every day I’ve lived in Manchester. I’ve missed you at every match, at every award ceremony, and every night when I crawl into bed alone. I miss you, Tessa.”

Tessa’s stomach churned with fresh ire, even if her heart broke a little. As angry as she was, part of her still had love for Jamie. Part of her always had. Part of her always would.

“Nothing’s changed, Jamie,” she said. “Unless you’re suddenly ready to come out?”

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