Page 76 of Snowed In

“I think we’re doing it okay.” He smirked, and of course, I laughed.

He always made me laugh.

“I mean… I’m going to say something and it’s probably going to freak you out, but don’t, okay, because this can be just this. If that’s what you need. Even if it hurts. I know you’re not into guys and I know?—”

“Shi. I’m obviously into at least one guy… This is?—”

“I get it. You don’t have to explain. This is like a life and death thing for you, right? But I have to say?—”

“Jesus, Shi, this isn’t?—”

I covered his mouth with my hand, my courage waning as he stared at me with growing confusion.

What if he started to freak out? What if we made it out of this mess and he regretted this entire night.

I let out a long-shuddered breath. I had to tell him the truth. Evenif it meant I lost my best friend. I wanted him to know how much he meant to me.

“I fell in love with you when I shouldn’t have. Knowing this could never happen. And maybe I’m out there, buried in snow, half frozen to death in the wilderness, and this is all something my brain has conjured up to help me fade into the inevitable end, but I fucking love you, Gary, so much sometimes I can’t breathe, and God, that’ so sappy and gross but it’s true.” Relief, like nothing I’d ever felt flooded through me as he smiled. I leaned my forehead against him with a giant exhale. “I need you to say something.”

“Sappy and gross… that’s the most romantic thing I’ve ever heard.” I could hear the smile in his voice and leaned back to see his eyes. They were crystal clear and honest as he wiped away the moisture that had fallen unbidden down my cheeks. “Have you always been such a crybaby?”

“I seriously hate you.” I moved, trying to get back into my own seat when he grabbed my hips, holding me in place.

I’d never realized how big Gary’s hands were until they were pressed against my skin.

“This… kissing you… isn’t some stress-induced reaction to my near-death experience. Shi… I was confused for a very long time, but you… I want you. I have for awhile.”

“You have?”

“I think I fell for you the day I walked into that fucking bookstore.” He shook his head, lost in memory. “You were so quiet, hiding behind that ratty ass copy ofEragon. I thought you were so cute. You’re always so damn cute, and I didn’t want to admit to myself, what I think, I’ve known for most of my life… but you... you made me want to admit it. You made me want to be honest with myself.” More stupid tears spilled over my lashes as I blinked. He kissed me once on the corner of my mouth and then again on my nose. “For real… have you always cried this much.”

“Fuck off,” I hiccupped a laugh as I rubbed my cheeks. “I’m stuck in a ditch and the guy I’m stupid in love with is actually in love withme too, and we wasted two whole years, and now we’re most likely going to die by exposure to the elements.”

“I have some blankets in the trunk. We could get cozy in the back seat,” he said with a suggestive raise of his brows.

“Get cozy… You seem to have transitioned into your queerness without a hitch.”

The humor left his eyes as he drew me in for another deep kiss. “I’m sure about you, Shi. Always have been. It just took me a second to trust myself.”

“Or a life-altering event?”

“It’s easier to see how much you love someone when you’re threatened with the chance of losing them.” He lifted my chin, his gaze finding mine. “I hate that it took two deer trying to murder us to figure that out. I’ve wasted enough time. I love you, and if we make it out of this, I’m going to spend every day showing you how much.”

“You can start now,” I said, and trailed my fingers over his jaw and the slope of his neck, letting my mouth hover over his.

“Mmm… how?”

“Admit it… elves are better than dwarves.”

Chapter Four

Gary

“And this is when we break up…” I laughed at his attempt at a scowl. “I’m serious. Fastest relationship ever. World record… How long did that last, four minutes? Maybe five, I think?—”

Shi kissed me to shut me up and I didn’t argue. Though, admitting I liked elves better than dwarves was never going to happen.

“I suppose I can compromise, and let you love your short, bearded men if, and only if, you agree elves are the superior fighters.”

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