Page 75 of All Your Hate

I should be disgusted, but I’m not. The thought of them dying in those gruesome ways fills me with a sick satisfaction.

“Good,” I rasp out.

He groans in pleasure as he presses his lips to the scars on my neck and I try not to react, but god is it difficult. As twisted as it is, I want him. For some reason, my body aches for him.

Sex with Bones is an experience I’ve never had before. It’s rough and carnal, full of both pleasure and pain. Maybe it’s just because my world has become so small, but it’s hard to imagine not having him in my life.

“Bones, I—I—”What am I even trying to ask him?

“It’s okay. Remember they won’t ever hurt you again.”

None of this isokay,but when he tilts my head to the side and softly kisses my lips, I feel like I could at least pretend it is. A tiny sigh escapes me and I lean back so he can kiss me more.

His hands roam my body, teasing me, making me hotter and wetter. My eyes close and I let myself enjoy his touches.

Again I see the faceless men in my mind. But this time they’re not hurting me. They’re watching as Bones makes me his.

“Every man that hurt you is going to die and you’re going to help me kill them.” His words wash over me, cooling my heated skin while also burning me up from the inside.

“Yes,” I say, not really understanding what I’ve just agreed to. All I want is him.

“I’m going to claim every part of you. This pussy is already mine, these beautiful lips, your vicious tongue. All mine. Soon your tight little ass will be as well.”

I’m shocked back to reality as a locked-away memory of one of the men staking his claim to that part of me comes back. I thought that was my vivid imagination all this time, but it was real. What else that I played off as just a nightmare actually happened to me?

I wish Bones kept his mouth shut. Each way he tells me he wants me is a reminder of how I’ve already been ruined.

My blood goes cold and I spring up off his lap. “I can’t do this.”

Without looking back at him, I run from the room and upstairs to the bathroom.

I need to get these clothes off me and rub the feeling of those men off my skin.

Bones is wrong. They’ll always be there in the back of my mind, on my flesh, in my body.

I tear my clothes off and turn the shower on, cranking the temperature up as I step under it. Grabbing the loofah I start rubbing it over me until my skin turns red.

“What the fuck are you doing?”

Bones steps in behind me. His clothes immediately getting soaked under the spray.

“Do you think I’m so easy that I’ll give it up right now? Fine. Go ahead and take it. Why not knock me out while you’re at it? Use me like they did,” I scream at him and he grabs my wrists, pinning me back against the tiles.

“I'd never do that.”

"You're such a hypocrite! Do you actually hear yourself?"

He gathers my wrists in one hand and I recoil as he reaches across me, but it’s only to turn the water temperature down.

He looks deep into my eyes and it’s like he can see every one of my demons.

“Get on your knees.”

My chest heaves as he speaks. I’m so aware of how exposed I am to him, but his eyes don’t stray from mine.

“You just said you wouldn’t take from me.” I try to keep my voice steady as he takes his ruined clothes off.

“I’m not.You’regoing to take fromme.Did our lessons with the rope teach you nothing? Whenever you feel like this I want you to use me until I’m the only man you feel.”