Page 89 of Pretend for Me

Audrey had parted ways with Sonny's to give her animals and all animals in need the time they so desperately deserved. She spent her days doing what she loved with who she loved. In his free time away from the hospital, Henry helped Audrey with more difficult rescues, being her rock in any storm.

“A toast,” Holden boasted standing from his seat. “Sorry, Matt, you’re not a good toastmaster. Our engagement party was proof of that.”

Matthew laughed and leaned over to kiss my cheek. “I got the girl, didn’t I?”

EPILOGUE

CASSIE

Four years later

Istomped up the stairs of our house, huffing with every step I took.

“Cassie, will you please talk to me?” Matthew followed behind me, hot on my tracks. I knew he wasn’t going to let me run away from this. Not after all the progress we made.

“No, Matthew. I can’t believe this.” I sobbed, almost closing the door to the upstairs bathroom before Matthew got there, but he sprinted up the steps before I did, sticking his foot in the door.

I sat on the toilet, crying into my hands. Matthew kneeled before me, and I hated him seeing me like this. Weak and vulnerable.

“Cassie, these things take time. We can’t rush it. We’ll keep trying and eventually—” Matthew reasoned, but he was quickly cut off by a now hysterical me.

“There is no eventually, Matthew. It either happens or it doesn’t. I should have known this won’t be easy. Nothing in mylife is,” I spat. I really didn’t mean those words. I was grateful for everything I had been through because it led me to right now. Except right now was me crying about getting my period after being two days late.

Matthew rubbed up and down my arms. Every month, it was the same rollercoaster.

Tears streamed down my red cheeks. “What if all the times I said how I didn’t want to be pregnant, God listened and now isn’t going to give us a baby?” I whispered, terrified that this was even going through my head.

Ever since we started trying ten months ago, every negative pregnancy test only reminded me of how much I once didn’t want the alternative.

After five years of being back together, and with a hell of a lot of therapy and tears, we’d finally made the decision to bring a baby into the world. A little piece of Matty and me. I could practically imagine the little boy with crazy hair and green eyes. It was all I thought about.

“Cassie, it will happen. It’s just going to take time. Henry said—” Matthew started, but I grabbed his hand that was on my arm.

“You told Henry?!” I shrieked, annoyed that Matthew shared our struggles with someone other than Phil.

Matthew nodded. “I wanted to help. Please don’t be mad. I also have been speaking to Phil about it during my sessions, and he said adoption would be good to consider and could really benefit us in our healing.”

I sat and listened, and soon I apologized for my rash behavior.

Once I overcame my fear of pregnancy and death, baby fever kicked in. Even though I wasn’t fearful of having a child anymore, I still wanted to be smart and have provisions set up in case Matthew and I were to pass away. I also wanted to vet mydoctors and ensure no malpractice cases were associated with them.

“Maybe I can call some of the caseworkers I work with?” Matthew implored. He was proud of his contacts and the children he had helped so far. I was so fucking proud of him as well.

Two years ago, he became a guidance counselor in our school district and was thrilled to be living his dream. Both professionally and personally.

I nodded. “Fine.” I paused for a minute, thinking. “But we can still try, right?”

Matthew stood from the bathroom floor and pulled me with him, leading me out into the hall. “Yes, baby. Try, try, try again. You know how much I love trying. I’m good at trying,” Matthew boasted, pressing me against the wall outside the bathroom. I felt how much he loved trying by the hardness in his pants.

I grabbed his neck and kissed him with such fervor and passion, he was stunned, but it didn’t take long for him to catch up.

Matthewand I stood on the doorstep, hand in hand. I looked back to see the gentleman accompanying us, messing around with paperwork in his truck. I rolled my eyes and shuffled from one leg to another, too nervous to stand still.

“Would this be a terrible time to tell you I’m pregnant?” I blurted, looking up at Matthew, who suddenly was gaping like a fish.

After a minute, I waved a hand in front of his face, and next thing I knew, he was spinning me around. He quickly setme down. “Oh shit, I didn’t hurt the baby, did I?” He gasped, checking me up and down to make sure I was okay.

I waved him off, and soon we heard a voice from the other side of the door. “You worthless little?—”

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