Page 76 of Worth the Risk

The look on his face begins to twist and turn into more of a grimace.

“I’m sorry, Noah. I never meant to hurt you, but I did try with us. I was attracted to Austin, yes, I can admit that, but I wanted to build a life with you. I chose you, I committed to you, I fell in love with you.”

“But then you pulled it all back. Once things took off with your firm, it was like he and that company were your world. That’s what you loved. I couldn’t compete with that.”

My chest burns.Is this what anguish feels like?

I hate the look on his face and even more, I hate that I put it there, that I caused all this. Maybe he’s right. Maybe I didn’t ever really give him and me a fair shot.

“I’m sorry,” I repeat as the tears fall. “I thought I was doing the right thing.” I sniff through broken sobs. “I thought…” I cover my face with my hands, unable to finish.

“You might have chosen me, but all you did was keep me on the hook while also keeping me at arm’s length. You neverlooked at me the way you look at him in those videos. You never kissed me like that.”

I stand on the sidewalk, my tear-stained face probably streaked with mascara as pedestrians bump into me and walk past us like we don’t even exist.

“Why’d you stay?” I wipe frantically at my eyes with the back of my hand. “Why didn’t you leave when it felt like I was trying everything to get close to you and you kept pushing me away?” My voice is frantic. “Why tell me everything I’m doing is wrong? Why pretend like you wanted me back if you didn’t?”

His eyes have grown cold. He looks at me like I too am a stranger on the sidewalk who is just in his way. Then a slow, cynical smile creeps across his face.

“I just didn’t want him to have you.”

His words feel like ice water pouring over my body. I stare at him in disbelief, waiting for him to soften, to say he’s just saying things out of anger, but there isn’t an ounce of the man I thought I knew behind those eyes. He doesn’t say another word; he just steps around me, bumping my shoulder in the process.

I stand there for several more minutes, the sounds of the city muffled by my thoughts.

“Miss Taylor, are you okay?” Hank opens the door, reaching for my elbow and leading me back into the lobby. “Why don’t you let me help you take your stuff upstairs?”

I nod, in a daze. I walk next to him, picking up a few of the bags and stepping into the elevator.

“This is going to be a fantastic dinner.” He smiles, looking down at the steaks, but I just stare forward. “Are you sure you’re gonna be okay?” he asks one more time after placing the items on my kitchen island.

I nod. “Thank you.”

“Sure thing,” he says, stepping back through my front door and closing it behind him.

I walk to my couch, falling into the fetal position and pulling a blanket up over my head and closing my eyes. Just wanting to shut out the world and my thoughts for a little while.

When I wake, no idea how many hours later, there’s a frantic pounding at my front door.

“Taylor. Taylor, please open up.”

I blink a few times in confusion, pulling the blanket from my head only to realize it’s almost dark out. I grab my phone. There are dozens of missed calls and texts from Austin.

“Baby, please!” I hear him say through the door again and I shoot off the couch. But then the incident with Noah comes rushing back, his cruel words, the way he looked at me. Tears threaten to fall again. I look over at the now spoiled groceries strewn across my island. Finally, I make my way to the door, unlocking the deadbolt and slowly opening the door.

“Jesus Christ.” Austin pushes the door open, his hands on my arms, his eyes studying me in a panic. “Are you okay? What’s going on?” He pulls me into his arms, wrapping me close. “I was so worried. I went home after work and you weren’t there. I kept calling you.”

I don’t respond. I just stand there in a daze. He cups my face, looking at me intently for several more seconds.

“Baby,” he finally says a little more sternly, “what happened?”

“I’m a terrible person.”

CHAPTER 22

Austin

“He said what to you?” My body vibrates with anger as she recounts the conversation she had on the street with Noah.

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