She laughed softly and sank down onto the lounger next to me. “That’s what friends are for.” She took a cautious sip of her coffee. “And don’t change the subject.” I shrugged. There was nothing I could say to that. “So, have you made a decision on what you’re going to do?”

I thought about Carol’s offer to come and stay with her and Craig for a while. They had an empty garage apartment. It sounded like a good plan, but I wasn’t ready to accept that Hawk wanted me gone. I was holding on to the stupid thought that he’d only been saying things that he thought I needed to hear, and that I could somehow change his mind. I hadn’t been back to the club, not because he’d told me not to, but because I was too weak to argue with him. Those days, along with the healing of my face and body, were gone now, and I felt ready to face him.

“Not until I face Hawk one last time,” I finally responded, knowing that Carol wouldn’t like my decision. “I just need to see him one last time, to−”

“God, honey, you’re a glutton for punishment.”

“Stubborn,” I said with a smile.

Like him.

“Don’t you think you’ve been hurt enough? First Dane, and then the incident with that cop? Seems like this bike club is bad news.”

Carol was right, I knew she was, but it didn’t dim my fierce need for Hawk. I felt complete with him, but how would I ever know if we were meant to be together if he didn’t give us a chance? Maybe I should just leave with her and start my life over. Forget that any of this happened, acknowledge that it was just a hiccup in a brief chapter of my life, convince myself that the scars I had were from normal surgeries, like appendix removal or something. Maybe I didn’t want to see what was right in front of me.

“I have to know, Carol. Even if I end up getting hurt, I have to confront him one last time. He’s had three weeks to think about what happened—”

“And he hasn’t been here once, honey,” she said in a gentle tone. “It’s obvious he thinks it’s better this way. Maybe he’s doing you a favor. You going to him and forcing the issue could backfire.”

I closed my eyes and leaned my head back. “Why do you have to be so damned sensible?” I whispered. I was not going to cry.

“One of us has to be.” I could hear the smile in her voice. “Now, do I make two plane reservations?”

I nodded. A little later I heard Carol get up. She must have thought that I fell asleep. But I was thinking about Hawk, and I couldn’t leave without seeing him at least to thank him, and to say goodbye. Yeah, that was a good excuse to see him. What kind of person would I be if I didn’t thank the man for saving me?

Who was I kidding?

I was going to fight for us.