Page 95 of A Quarterback for Christmas

When he doesn’t move from my touch, I have to stop myself from getting close. Just one last time, I want to hug him like I have that right. The same right that Brianna still has.

“Why do you want me to stay?” he asks with a sparkle of interest in his eyes. Would Drew staying relieve my guilty conscience since I know I’m the one that lured him up to that room? Yes. But that’s not the only reason. I might have thought I hated him before because I blamed him for my lack of a relationship with my dad, but it’s not his fault. They worked well together and deserved to be successful.

“You deserve the best chance of getting drafted, and that’s with my dad.”

“Is that the only reason?”

Even now, alone with Drew, admitting my feelings is hard, not because I don’t know what they are. I know them all too well, but what’s the point in declaring them now? It’s not going to change anything.

“I have to leave,” he answers because he knows I won’t. “I can’t be taken seriously here. That’s something your dad taught me. Integrity. I need that if I’m going to lead a team to victory next season, and Ineedto do that if I want to be taken seriously in the draft.”

“Can you just wait out this year and try again with my dad?”

“And waste a year doing nothing? I can’t do that. Firstly, riding the bench for a season would be torture. I need to be outthere, managing the plays. Secondly, one of the most important things that my dad taught me was that I needed to live for now because I have no idea how long I have left. Right now, I have my health, which is a lot more than he had at the end. I don’t want to waste it.”

I bite my bottom lip, feeling somewhat bad that I’ve always given Drew such a hard time. Although he frustrated me, at least my dad was here, and he cared about me and my future.

“Why didn’t you call me when you found out about the video?”

“Honestly?” He raises his chin and looks at me. “I thought you were part of it. There was a moment where I thought our whole relationship was some big ass conspiracy to get rid of me because you still hated me.”

“Sounds extreme, even for me.”

“Coach told me they found the guy that did it. It was some idiot in security who, funnily enough, didn’t think about the long-term consequences of sharing porn across the campus system. I gotta admit, I was relieved when I found out it wasn’t you, but it made me think about things.”

“What things?”

“About you and me.”

My heart rate spikes. I’m here because I need to figure out what’s happening between us, but it doesn’t make the conversation any easier.

“I think we need to end things.”

I’m speechless for a moment. “I thought we already had.”

“Yeah, I thought we had, too. But then you came bursting through my door, seemingly unaware of the video and pissed that I was sitting with Brianna. I can’t forget you, Bella, because every time I look at you, I see things I’ve never seen before.”

“What kind of things?”

His jaw ticks, and just when I think he’s about to speak, he shakes his head. “Doesn’t matter. I’ve been thinking about it,and I’ve come to accept that Southern Collegiate is the best place for me. A fresh start away from any of the Summers’ family will do me good. I need to leave because our dynamic isn’t healthy.”

“If anyone should go, it should be me. I was the one to lead you in there.”

“I didn’t stop you, and besides, for you to leave, you’d have to admit it was you. Everyone already knows it’s me; no point dragging another person down.”

“Still, you shouldn’t have to move from the best D1 ranking team to the worst. Didn’t their entire team get suspended over some awful hazing incident?”

“Then I’ll fit right in,” he mumbles. “If it means I can play, then I’ve got to do it.”

“But you’ll be playing with their backup team.”

“Better than riding the bench here.”

My heart sinks because I’m watching Drew’s dream die over something we did together. Closing my eyes, I know I can’t leave it like this.

“What about if I admitted that I was the one that lured you into the room? It’s not your fault. I did it because I was jealous and wanted your attention on me. If I knew it would cost you everything, I would take it back in a heartbeat.”

Finally acknowledging my hand, he places his over it, weaving our fingers together. His brown eyes are filled with warmth and surprise, but I can already see the answer before he speaks.

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