Page 40 of Trash the Dress

I throw on some clothes and wander through the rooms of my house, hoping to find her still here, but knowing deep down she’s gone. When I enter the room I deemed hers, I find what I expected…her things are gone.

I swipe a hand down my face in frustration. The old me would leave her alone. I’d let her run from this, from us, because I’d be running too. But something changed last night for me. I’m not sure if it was her skin against mine, or her kiss on my lips, or if it was the tears in her eyes that shook the already melting ice from my heart. I do know she’s the only one who has been able to change the course of my life, whether by design or accident.

With my mind made up, I call Dad and tell him I need him to cover the bar for me today and possibly tonight. He agrees and wishes me luck after a brief explanation. I’m thankful Scarlett’s business card has her office address on it. And if that fails, I’ll swing by her apartment. I’ve only been by her building once when we met for lunch over the last few weeks.

I went to her that day because she had been actively avoiding me and Greendale Valley. I may not know what the inside of her apartment looks like, but I know the building and number. I know she kept her own place even though some of her thingswere athis house. She’s been back in her apartment since she moved her stuff out of her ex’s place in the weeks after the almost wedding fiasco.

It takes just under an hour to get to her office, but the lot is empty, so I move on to her apartment. When I pull in the parking lot, I see her car. Relief floods me along with renewed determination to show this woman what she’s come to mean to me.

The closer I get to her apartment, I realize my heart is racing. I hadn’t stopped to think what might happen if she rejects me. I’ve only thought about convincing her to give us a chance. It dawns on me, if she does reject me, it will ultimately finish off my fragile heart. The same heart she’s breathed life back into.

I reach her door and release a shaky breath before knocking. About thirty seconds later, her lock turns and the piece of wood separating us opens. Her surprised gaze meets mine. “Hello, sunshine.”

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

Scarlett

When I rushed back to my apartment this morning, the guilt chased me like a shadow as I glanced in the rearview, but I still drove away with tears tracking down my cheeks. Last night was incredible, but with the passion and tenderness that came with it, I realized I’ve fallen hard for this man whose heart is unattainable. I couldn’t face him in the light of day after what we shared all night.

Could he ever love me the way I want and need to be loved? Would he stay forever? Those are questions I don’t know the answers to, and I’m not sure I could bear the truth. He may not be able to love me at all. What would I do then? Have to witness women come in and out of his life in front of our child so his needs are met?

No, I can’t live that way. I’m not strong enough to do it. For my baby’s sake, I figured drawing a line and ending whatever we stumbled into is best for all of us. Safer. I’ll come up with something when I talk to him again.

I’m about to get in the shower when a knock sounds at my door. It’s probably Anna. She stops by as much as she can. Even so, uncertainty washes over me because she knew I was staying with Zander this weekend and she wouldn’t expect me back until tomorrow evening.

I open my front door, and the breath is sucked from my lungs when I find Zander standing there. My ridiculous heart jumps at the sight. Did he really come and find me? I’m sure he only wanted to be sure I was okay since I’m the woman carrying his child because silly me, in my haste to escape, I didn’t leave a note.

But still, he could’ve called instead of driving an hour here.

“Hello, sunshine,” he says with his southern drawl.

“Zander, what are you doing here?”

He steps inside and I close the door behind him.

“When the mother of my child leaves without so much as a note the morning after we had a night filled with lovemaking, I’m going to find her,” he says, his intense, dark gaze holds me in place.

“I, um, I didn’t think…” I trail off.

He steps close to me and tips my chin up. “You asked me to make love to you, Scarlett. But I don’t think you knew what you were asking, or maybe you did. I swore I wouldn’t open up to a woman again, but I did for you. Imagine my surprise when I woke up to find you missing when last night all I could think was how much I wanted you to stay.”

“You didn’t say anything, Zander. You said you couldn’t give me more than something physical. And I don’t believe one night changed your mind,” I say.

He leans in and presses a soft kiss to my lips, still holding my chin. “I know what I said, and even more what I should’ve said. But, Scarlett, one night can change a lot of things,” he says as heprotectively rubs my swollen belly where our baby grows…proof that a lot of big things can happen in one night.

Tears cloud my vision. “I’m scared to love you, Zander. I’m sorry. I know that sounds selfish when you’re here putting yourself on the line for me, but it’s the truth. It’s not just me and you to consider. I’m not sure I’d survive you changing your mind and leaving us.”

He pulls me into his strong embrace and rests his chin on my head. “My sweet sunshine…I’m scared too. But the world hasn’t been the same since I found you. If we don’t crash and burn, we might just love each other forever. I think we owe it to ourselves and our baby to find out. Don’t you?”

“I want to say yes,” I answer.

“Say yes, Scarlett. Give me a chance to be the man who holds your heart. I didn’t come all the way here to give up on you.”

My hopeful heart leaps to my throat. “Yes,” I say while nodding.

“Yeah?” he asks while his dark gaze roams over my face.

“Yes. But please don’t break me.”

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