Page 52 of Burning for the Truth

Hawk mutters something inaudible when Tate grabs the brush from him. “Come on to the house and have a beer. Lucy’s with her mom planning out last-minute wedding details this evening, so it’ll only be me and Rocky. You can keep us company. Or we can go to High Road if you prefer,” he says with a wicked smile on his face.

They walk off toward their vehicles after telling us goodnight.

Sterling crosses his arms and stares at me with a smirk on his face. “Spill it, Dean. What’s up?”

I blow out a nervous breath. “Okay, I want to talk to you…just me and you.”

He stands still watching me sweat. “I gathered that,” he says.

“I love Briella. I know this isn’t what you ever expected…for your best friend to be in love with your baby sister, but here we are. I know you probably think she can do better than me and maybe she can, but I swear to you no one will ever love her the way I do. If she gives me a chance, I have every intention of marrying her one day. And no matter what you say, I’m going to be with her because…Briella makes me whole. She told you that day in her apartment I might be the one to save her, but, Sterling”—I shake my head and smile while keeping my gaze fixed on his—“she’s the one who saves me. In her eyes, I’m the man I’ve always wanted to be, and I promise I’ll do all I can to live up to that. I guess what I’m asking is, do I have your blessing to be with your sister?”

His smile drops and he holds eye contact with me while grabbing my shoulder. “Nothing would make me happier than to know my baby sister is loved by one of the best men I know. I’d be proud to call you brother. Because I already do.” He winks then and a heartfelt smile tips up his lips. “This simply makes it official.”

My shoulders feel like a weight has been lifted as he pulls me in for a hug. Now I just need to know where I stand with one other person…the woman I love herself, Briella Brigg.

Iwalk into High Road Bar for the first time since the fire at Wally’s and Michael’s arrest. Music plays through the speakers like always and the room smells of cigarettes and whiskey. I hear the clinking of balls on the pool table and laughter sounds around me. For a moment, I close my eyes and relive seeing Drew’s brilliant smile when he approached me for the first time and stole my breath. I’ll never not miss him. He’s a part of me and losing him shook me down to the bone.

I hear a familiar voice call my name, pulling me from a moment in time when Drew was still here with me. I don’t want to open my eyes because I know when I do, he’ll disappear, and right now I can almost feel him beside me.

“Bree? Are you okay?” Brittney calls.

I blink my eyes open and see her worried eyes staring back at me. She’s studying me in question and relief. I glance beside her and see Zander staring at me quizzically as well.

I smile. “I’m working on it. Can you come somewhere with me?” I shift my gaze from Brittney to Zander. “I won’t keep her long, I promise.”

“Anything you need, Bree.” He walks around the bar and pulls me into a hug. “Sure am happy to see you in one piece.”

“Thanks, Zander. I won’t keep her out long,” I tell him.

She takes off her apron, still studying me with worry etched in the crease of her brow. She meets me and I take her hand, pulling her with me to my car. “Where are we going, Bree?”

“I need to finally say goodbye in the one place I feel the closest to him.” I glance at her and smile softly. “And I need my best friend to help me do it.”

She nods and we drive in silence as she holds my hand.

When we arrive at Drew’s house, I notice the crime scene tape is gone. I get out of my car and Brittney follows. I glance over and see his truck in the same place. I pull out my key as I get to the front door. My hand trembles when I turn the lock. We go in and everything is in order.

Brittney follows me into the bedroom, and I flip on the light. I glance at the photo of us on his nightstand and my heart squeezes. We were so happy and in love. I grab his sweatshirt out of his closet, the one I loved, and his cologne. I spot his favorite ballcap and his sunglasses and I gently place them with the other things on his bed.

“What are you doing?” Brittney asks.

“I’m taking a piece of him with me. I know I already have his heart. But I’m done hiding from his memory. I’m going to embrace it. For so long, I’ve avoided it and now that the investigation is closed, I can finally let go of the anger and just keep his memory instead. Can you give me a minute alone?”

She nods as a tear drops down her cheek.

I sit on the bed and pick up the picture of us, it was his favorite. I place it with the other stuff I’m taking. I close my eyes as tears fall and I speak from my heart. Even if he can’t hear me, this is where I feel close to him.

“Drew, I love you so much. I miss your smile and your quirky ways. I promise there isn’t a day that goes by where I won’t think of you. I know you aren’t physically here, but I’ll carry you with me always. This is my letter to you. Thank you so much for opening my heart and loving me. Even if I knew what would happen when I met you, I’d do it all again. You took a piece of me with you when you left, and it will always be yours. But you taught me you can always find more room in your heart to love when you need to. And in your letter, you told me to move on and find happiness because that’s the kind of selfless way you loved me.” I laugh as tears stream down my face.

“I’ll do that for you. I couldn’t before. I couldn’t let you go, and I won’t even now. But I know you, and I know you’d tell me to stop being so stubborn. You’d tell me not to be afraid and I am, Drew. I’m afraid of living without you even if I know moving on is the right thing to do. Somehow you always made things okay…and when you…” I swallow hard, refusing to saywhen you diedout loud. “…you left it so I’d be okay too. Your letter helped me, so I hope somehow you hear this…my letter to you.” I feel something like a gentle breeze on my face even though there is no air moving in this room, and I touch it as if I could really be touching him. I feel love and I feel peace. My heart recognizes him all around me.

“I love you, Drew. Please continue to watch over me…over us. You are so loved. I promise I’ll make you proud this side of heaven until I can see you again.” I feel the gentle breeze touch me again before it’s gone, and suddenly, I feel alone again.

I clutch my chest and cry until Brittney comes to my side and she holds me close and cries with me.

Once we leave Drew’s house, I feel better. I feel a little closer to whole. We pull up at High Road Bar and she stares at me. “Are you going to be okay now?”

I smile at her. “I will.”

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