Page 41 of Burning for the Truth

“I need some air.” She walks out of the office as Slade and Alex both shove their hands in their pockets and face me.

“Stay close to her, Dean. I don’t think we’re off base with this. Whoever our guy is, he’s close,” Slade says solemnly.

I look out my window and see her in front of the building, her shoulders slumped with grief. “I know. I think you’re right. And I have a feeling it’s all about to explode. I just hope we all survive the blast this time.”

A truck stops in front of her. I squint my eyes and see Jake. I make my way to her out front and see Michael in the truck with him.

“Hey, Jake, what can we do for you?” I ask, not speaking to Michael on purpose.

He leans over so he can see me from the driver’s side. “We saw Bree and stopped to see if she was okay. She seemed upset. Everything all right?”

I put my arm around her waist and pull her into me. “We’re fine. Thanks.”

She sniffles a little. “Yeah, he’s right. I just needed some air.”

Michael speaks up this time, “You can come hang out with me at High Road if you need to get some time away from everything. We can play a few games…drinks on me.” He winks. The man has the balls to wink at her in front of me while she’s pressed against my side.

“I think we can get our own drinks, but thanks,” I snap.

He laughs. “I guess it’s a good thing I wasn’t talking to you, then.”

I tense and Briella pushes on my chest. “He’s right. Dean and I…we’re figuring things out right now.”

“You’re seeing this prick? Isn’t he the reason your boyfriend died? It’s what I heard anyway,” he says with venom.

Jake growls at him. “Mike, what the hell? That’s not true. You don’t get to be an asshole because you have a crush and she’s interested in someone else.” Jake’s anger is palpable.

But I stand firmly in place, and I think I may physically feel my heart explode from how bad that hurt. Briella turns her fury on Michael. “I can’t believe you said that. I know you’re cynical because of your past and the pain that comes with it, but you should know better than to twist a knife in someone else’s wound.”

He blanches. “Look, I’m sorry. I know it isn’t true…Jake’s right. I have a crush on you, but that gives me no right to tear someone else down. Please accept my apology. You know that’s not the kind of person I am.”

“I know. It’s really hard on all of us right now and emotions are running high,” she tells him.

Jake stares at me pointedly. “Really, man. It isn’t true. You know that.”

I don’t speak, I simply watch as they eventually drive off. Briella turns her attention on me. “Dean, tell me you don’t believe that’s true.”

I feel myself sway a little. I don’t know how to come out and say I do feel responsible for Drew’s death. I feel responsible for breaking her heart. She looks up at me and I give her a small, blank smile before walking away from her and back into my office so I don’t have to face her. Who am I kidding? I ruined her life by not being able to save Drew. I’m nowhere near the kind of man he was. I may love her with all I am, but I’ll never be deserving of her love.

Afew weeks go by doing the same thing…tossing around theories and looking over our shoulders. Nothing new has happened, but we know it isn’t over. It feels like everyone’s tiptoeing around a sleeping volcano…hiding our emotions as we wait on a deadly eruption.

All I know is something has to give soon. We can’t keep living in this semblance of what lifeshouldbe. Dean and I spend every day together. We’re either at my apartment, his office at the fire station, or at Valley B. Occasionally, we make it to High Road so I can see Brittney. Zander always lets her take breaks long enough to spend time with me. Even Michael has turned over a new leaf and tried to make amends with Dean for his blatant, hateful words that day.

It breaks my heart to think Dean blames himself. But he won’t talk to me about it. I know he sees Leah for therapy the same as me. In many ways, he’s helped me heal even though he refuses to acknowledge it.

Tonight, we’re having dinner with Sterling and Ivie. “Briella, Chief wants to talk to you,” Sterling says after we eat while Ivie puts Aria to bed.

“I have nothing to say right now.” I pin him under my stare as Dean fidgets uncomfortably next to me.

“Dean, I thought you were trying to talk some sense into her.” He glances around me to Dean.

I throw my hand up in his face. “Dean doesn’t have anything to do with this. I’ll talk to Chief when I’m ready, and I won’t be ready until I find who we’re looking for. You can tell him that, yeah?”

Sterling slumps his shoulders in defeat. “Briella, I love you. I want this to end too, but I don’t want you to give up your career because you’re upset.”

“I’m not. I’ll talk to Chief Trudeau soon and try to work things out, I promise,” I say calmer than I thought possible when talking about the future of my career.

“When things are meant to be, they’re worth the wait,” I tell Sterling as I reach for Dean’s hand.

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