Page 39 of Repossess My Heart

“Do not scan her!” I snap, turning on him. “She’s mine. And nothing has derailed, plans change, I’m closer than ever to getting what I want.”

“And what is that exactly,Nine?”

I turn away from him, heading out of his sight not nearly far enough before he calls after me, “Rest up and make it to my wing. Bring the girl.”

Reverie’s lips part as the pod slides open at my approach, a soft snore interrupting me as I reach up to touch her soft lips. It appears I’m no longer quite so disgusted by the idea of wanting to give her soft touches, ones that don’t cause pain. My eyes canvas her weakened state, the lovely bruises covering her body, knowing most of them are from me alone. When I swallow it's harder, I don’t bother scanning for illness or malfunction when my chest constricts at the sight of her. Knowing with certainty for the first time… when it’s time to cut her open, it’s going to hurt.

As I prep the shower unit, still holding her limp body in my arms, I analyze all of my most recent memories. They aren’t filled with helpful information. There’s no mental maps taken down to get back to useful places in the city, no future victims, there’s only her. The deeper I go the less it is close ups of her ass or cunt, her screaming out in pleasure… there are more shots of her eyes, the way she chews her lip, her playing with her hair when she’s lost in thought. The annoying way she mispronounces words or earlier today when she’d confidently read out a sign, unaware she’d read it entirely wrong.

She doesn’t know how to read, not well anyway.

My fists tighten before I lash out, slamming my mechanical arm into the concrete wall of the bathroom until it’s a crater, the steel supports inside bent. The thick smell of smoke rises from gears as they grind in my arm.

She should know how to read before she dies.

My mind goes foggy, so foggy I can’t tell if it’s the steam from the shower unit or my own madness clouding everything. I sit down, tugging her up higher on my chest before I let my insanity take me.

“You like her.”

I don’t deny it as Michael’s battered face tilts into view. This time he’s hanging by his legs where they’re draped over the clothing rack. Swinging in the closet back and forth like we would at the play place where mom always met her contacts.

“I have to kill her; I don’t see why it matters.” I finally answer, this time I watch through the slats where I hid the night they were murdered. I watch, hoping the rage will snap my world back into perspective.

“Of course it matters, big brother. It’s hard to kill things you have feelings for. It’s hard to watch them die too. To let them be murdered yet here you are… watching.”

I nod, trying to make sense of the scene before me. Whose blood belongs to who and how I just sat here all those years ago. “I’m sorry.”

I’ve seen carnage, a lot of it. Never have I seen anyone do what the Mig did to my mom. Punching their way through her intimate area until the fingers could grip her jaw from the inside. The way they held her up and walked her like a puppet.

Michael screams again, begging them to stop. I squeeze my eyes shut.

“Open your eyes Nine, if you’re trading me… trading us in for her, the least you can do is watch.”

“I would never-“

“Come on Nine, open your eyes. This is the best part.”

My fists clench as I force my eyes open, battling back the vomit burning in my throat. “How can you say that?”

“They took my eyes, you took hers, now we’re in this situation because Reverie’s eyes remind you of me. We’re both… irreparable. Look at me out there Nine, I’m screaming but…“

A Mig’s voice trills over his. “Look at this one’s eyes, it’s like he’s already dead. I want them.”

“…all the love you and mom showed me, all the fun we had never counted for anything. My eyes never changed after the day mom let one of her contacts rape me.”

“She didn’t know.” I whisper.

“She didn’t care, so caught up in trying to fix the fucking world. Right a wrong neither of us cared about. She stopped being a fucking mother.”

“Michael…”

“Look at us out there and tell me it’s not her fault-“

“You’re the fucking one that turned her in!” I snap, my chest heaving as the Migs pluck my baby brother’s eyes from his skull.

“Na-“

“Nine…” I correct.