Page 10 of Premonition of Peace

Muffling a sob and a groan, I let my head fall heavily onto the wheel with a thud. My shoulders started to shake with the effort to repress the cries itching to push out of me.Gods, he looked worse than I’ve ever seen him.The exhaustion was etched into every curve and groove of Marcel’s face. The pallor of his skin against the dark lines of magic threatening to break through was heartbreaking to see.

I felt like everything was weighing on me and I was crumbling beneath the pressure. I promised Marcel I’d find a cure for him, but I was no closer to that than when I started.

Now I got to add fuckingNot-Sasha to my never-ending list. New Chicago took a lot to run, and god knows it would fall toshit if I didn’t do everything I did underground and behind the scenes.

Banging my fists against the wheel, I let out a strangled scream of frustration. It all felt like too much to carry sometimes.

“But who else could carry it?” Caretaker asked kindly. “Who else could bear it?”

I nodded to myself because truly, who else could? It wasn’t just that I had the money to make things happen. I had the resources, the knowledge, and my eidetic memory that never let me forget a single thing. I knew I was capable of more than the average person because of my memory loci. Multiple versions of myself existed, researched, had conversions, all at the same time. My blessing might also be a curse, but it was one that I bore for the greater of the whole.

Taking a shuddering, barely steadying breath, I leaned back against the headrest and closed my eyes, pushing down the tears once again. Working to calm myself, I finally turned the ignition on, a blast of hot air hitting my skin. Putting the car into reverse, I pulled out. The drive back to my place passed in a blur. Soon enough I was tramping through Señora Rosara’s shop, stepping around one of her cats that was peering up at me with creepily human emotion.

Turning the key in the lock, the weight of exhaustion practically dragged me down as I stumbled my way into my apartment. I pushed the door closed carefully considering the bomb still planted on it, courtesy of Piper. Immediately veering for the kitchen, tea on the brain, I couldn’t help the yawn that pulled out of me.

I was already struggling to sleep with everything that we’ve had to face. Lucifer. The Morrigan. Bree. Lorcan. The literal hell hole that opened up in New Chicago . . . I shook my head as I pulled out the loose-leaf jasmine tea mix. Hopefully it wouldcalm my nerves and maybe allow me to get a couple of hours in before the anxiety nightmares started.

A few minutes later, I was swirling honey into a cup of jasmine tea, toast with brown spread over it sitting next to me. When I turned around holding a treat in each hand, my heart nearly leapt into my throat.

“Fuck, Lucifer,” I exclaimed, steadying my cup, glad my startling didn’t slosh its contents over the sides. Lucifer stood there, shirtless, leaning effortlessly against the fridge.

“The last time I heard you say that it was a lot breathier.” He looked away with a wistful, fond smile. “Maybe we can try to mimic that experience again.”

“Not likely.” I shot him a scowl, my heart still pounding as I scrambled for a way out of this conversation.

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” he said, a hint of amusement dancing in his eyes. He crossed his arms over his chest and his biceps flexed in a way that really justdidit for me, though I wished it wouldn’t.

For a moment, I forgot how to breathe properly. My eyes skimmed over the hard planes of his chest, across his arms, and down, down, down to the sharp Vee at his waist. Shaking it off, I forced myself to focus on his unearthly gorgeous face, ignoring the knowing smirk he wore.

“Why are you still here?” I set my food and tea on the counter and ran a hand through my hair, attempting to regain composure.

“Where else would I be?” he asked, quirking an eyebrow as if my question was just the most ridiculous thing he had ever heard.

“You got what you wanted. You’re back. Don’t you have devil things to do?”

“I’m exactly where I should be,” he answered without hesitation. “As for ‘devil things’ . . .” He paused for a secondbefore dragging his eyes over me lazily. “You look even more tired than usual.”

“You’re part of the reason I look like this,” I retorted, my voice a mix of weariness and irritation.

“Part, not whole.” He grinned in satisfaction, then looked at me with a more serious expression. “You’re under a lot of stress and not sleeping. You need to let your body rest, little witch.”

“I’ll sleep when the world isn’t falling apart,” I snapped. “Again.”

He stepped closer, the air suddenly thick with his presence. “Fuck the world. You need to take care of yourself more.”

“Not all of us can be as selfish as you,” I mutter to myself, sidestepping him and moving toward the living room.

“Don’t start with me.”

“Can we not?”

“Can we notwhatexactly, little witch?”

“Can we notdo this.” I motioned toward him with the hand holding my toast. “I’m tired. I’m cranky. And if you don’t leave me alone, I’m not responsible for the things I say.”

Lucifer chuckled. “Give me your anger. It may not taste as sweet as your lies, but I want it all the same.”

Internally, I felt a pang of betrayal mixed with a strong pull of attraction. I would love to relieve some stress with him. Damn, would I love it. But things didn’t feel the same anymore. After finding out he basically tricked me into fucking him back to life, I wasn’t in the mood for more games.

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