Page 22 of Rot

I let out a laugh. “So angry,” I whispered. “All I want to know is if it really was an accident.”

He still held onto my upper arms, his hands curling around them even tighter now. A few notches above uncomfortable, but he didn’t mind… and neither did I. “What are you trying to say?” He breathed out of his mouth now, his lips parted, ragged breaths as his chest practically growled.

“Was it an accident or did you—” I wasn’t able to finish my question, because one of his hands left my arm and shot up to my neck, curling around it with a fierceness that told me he didn’t want to talk about it. He gripped my neck so hard I couldn’t speak, so tightly I could hardly breathe.

His impossibly tall frame leaned over me as he whispered, “Do you still think this is funny?” His grip on my neck lessened just enough to let me speak, though it remained firmly planted around my throat.

I decided to tell him the truth: “No.” He seemed a little smug at that, but that smugness faded when I finished, “But I think it’s fun.”

Elias’s brows furrowed; he obviously wasn’t expecting me to say that. He was used to people either letting him be or bowing down to his attitude, but me… well, I wanted to poke the bear and see how vicious he could really be.

“We’re family,” I told him. “Tell me your secrets, and I’ll tell you mine.” My lips curled into a smile as I gazed unflinchingly into those pitch-black eyes. No matter what the truth was about his father’s death… my secrets were worse. They were always worse.

You couldn’t get worse than me. My soul had been born black, and it had only served to taint everything around it until now.

His nostrils flared, his frown deepening. His hand tightened around my neck as he asked, “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

I laughed—as much as I could laugh, given the tight hand around my throat. My next question I had to mouth out in a whisper, because that’s all I could get out: “What’s wrong withyou?”

“You come into my house, question me, like I’m on trial. You think you own the goddamned place,” Elias whispered, his tall frame bending somewhat so his face could lower to mine. The hand on my neck pulled me upward, to the point where I had to stand on my tiptoes, otherwise I’d be off the floor. “Who the fuck do you think you are?”

It was a struggle to get out this next part, for obvious reasons, “My grandmother would say it’s the rot.”

“The what?”

“The rot. I’ve got the rot in me. It makes me do things I shouldn’t, makes me say things I shouldn’t… and it makes me want things I shouldn’t.” The more I spoke, the looser his hand on my neck became, until I was no longer on my tiptoes—but we never broke eye contact.

Elias’s chest still rose and fell with hard, heavy breaths, and it sounded like he had to labor to say, “Sounds like an excuse.” His hand still clung to my neck, no longer choking, but simply holding. Underneath his touch, my skin was on fire.

“Maybe it is,” I whispered. “It’s a better excuse than nothing, don’t you think?” My hands had moved sometime when I wasn’t paying attention, resting on Elias’s sides. Once I was aware of where they were, I moved them to his chest, feeling the muscles underneath his shirt tensing.

“Unlike some little rich girls, I don’t need excuses,” Elias hissed out. He still sounded like he hated me, and yet… there was something else there, something other than hatred and venom, something I’d never heard in his voice before.

Maybe it was just because we were so close, in each other’s intimate space. Or maybe, just maybe, it was because we were more alike than either of us realized.

Neither one of us said anything after that. Elias didn’t pull away, nor could I. Obviously, I couldn’t, since I was still pinned against his door, so I guess I should say I didn’twantto. His hand remained around my neck, while mine clung to his shirt. His other hand had dropped off my arm, his fingers now resting near my hip.

We were locked in a staring contest, neither one of us wanting to be the loser. It was like we’d both gotten caught in the other’s web, like whatever spell was cast would be broken the moment one of us looked away.

Maybe it was stupid, but as I gazed into those black eyes, I swore I saw a reflection of myself. Not just a physical reflection, but a deeper one. Elias, I realized, might just have a soul like mine. He might be a twin flame, as dark as me, as rotten as me.

Was he truly, though? I supposed only time would tell. Either way, the possibility made me want him more than I should, in ways I shouldn’t.

He was my cousin. We were family.

And yet we were strangers. We’d never met before. We didn’t grow up together, so it was impossible to view him as off-limits. He was tall, mean, and, dare I say, sexy—a word I’d never used to describe anyone before. He was hateful and vile and rude. All the reasons everyone else would stay away from him if they were in my place only made the desire stronger.

I could hear his hard breathing start to slow. I could feel my own heart begin to regain control, and still… I still caught myself wondering what it would be like, how it would feel, to have those hands of his in other places, to feel those lips on mine.

I’d never been kissed before. A girl was allowed to dream about it, wasn’t she? Even if that dream was wrong.

Elias was the first to break eye contact with me, and that was only so his gaze could drop just a few inches lower on my face. His body shifted a bit; his tall frame dipping even lower. His face was so close to mine, we were breathing the same air.

I’d never know what would’ve happened if we hadn’t heard the door to the house open and close right then. When the sound of someone else coming home filled the air and rattled the door behind me, Elias was slow to drop his hand from my neck.

We heard someone coming up the steps. It sounded like whoever it was checked my room, first. “Elias, honey? Are you in there with Sloane?” His mother, from the voice. My mother wouldn’t give enough of a shit to come up here looking for us.

Elias straightened himself out, but he didn’t move away from me. “Yeah. I’m just…” He glanced at me. “Helping her catch up in some of her classes.” A lie.