Page 49 of No Ordinary Love

"Don't say that,Tesoro," he begged. "Pleasedon't say that."

"Oh, Lucas," I moaned.

He leaned his forehead against mine. "Don't send me away.

"Why?"

"Because I'm falling and failing, Amara. I need help. I need you."

"You want to fuck me," I said bitterly.

He hauled me to him, his hips against mine. I could feel him erect, and my stupid vagina, the one who had as much brains as probably his dick did, got wetter.

"Don't talk about what we do like that," he warned. "Ever. We were honest in bed with each other.Always."

We were, but I didn't want to cave. The more emotional distance I could maintain, the better.

Better for what? Break the dry spell, woman, and get laid.Though emotionally, it would be better if you picked a one-night stand at a bar than do the horizontal mambo again with Lucas because your heart will be involved and will eventually break…again.

"I don't know what you want from me," I cried out in exasperation.

"Everything. I want it all," he growled. "Kiss me,Tesoro."

"Lucas—"

He nibbled around my mouth and nuzzled me. I could smell the whiskey he had been drinking. I could smell his cologne. And him. Vital. Irresistible.Mine.

"You love me?" I demanded.

"More than my life."

"I won't share."

"You're the only woman I've wanted since I met you. The only woman I've been inside since I met you. The only woman I haveeverloved as a man."

"I don't know if we can be in a relationship again. I'll always be scared that you'll leave."

"Then I'll work hard every day so you don't ever feel like that again. So that you'll know my heart and know I'll never leave you because I can't live without you."

He was saying all the right things. I knew he wasn't being flippant. Lucas was a thoughtful man. He hadn't chased me down when I first left because he hadn't been sure of his feelings.But now he was, and he washere, begging me to not send him away, promising me the world.

"Your mother?" I had to know.

"Can go fuck herself," he said and shocked me. I'd never heard him say a single bad thing about his mother or even his sister. He'd admit they could be difficult at times, but he always found a way to make excuses for them.

I could send him away. Of course I could. He'd leave eventually. He'd keep trying for a while, but then he'd give up. He'd have to. No one could keep putting themselves through rejection forever.

But where would that leave me?

I still loved him. And he was telling me he loved me, too. I believed him, because Lucas didn't say things he didn't mean. In the two years we'd been together, he'd told me I was beautiful, that he cared about me, that he was crazy for me—but he'd never said he loved me.

I'd been a fool to move in with him without hearing those words. But I'd been so madly in love, I'd leapt without thinking.

But I'd grown up since then. I didn't take those risks anymore. We'd go slow this time. No moving in. No building a life together until we both were certain.

However, I'd give him comfort and take the same from him.

"Come to bed," I said softly. He smiled then. "Thank you,Tesoro."

---