Page 125 of Love Without Demands

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

In the calmest voice I could muster, I shot a sharp look over my shoulder. “Mama, call an ambulance. He’s having a heart attack.”

She let out a squeak of fear at the same time Paul emitted a grunt of protest. “I’m… fine.”

And then he collapsed in my arms.

I could hear Mama on the phone as I laid him out on the floor and checked him over. His pulse was thready, and his face blanched of color. He was conscious and still breathing—barely—so I didn’t need to start chest compressions. We just needed to get him to the hospital as soon as fucking possible.

“Cruz.” The single word was so weak and yet said so much. It was round and full of love.

Tears welled in my eyes when his eyelids closed, and I clutched his face in my hands in a panic. “Dad, wake up. Please, Dad.”

His eyes popped back open in surprise, and his lips tipped up in a small smile. “Y-you called me Dad.”

It was the first time I’d ever said it to him, and that burned my cheeks with shame.

“Because that’s what you are. I’ll say it every day if you’ll just stay with me.”

Tears dripped from my eyes and landed on his chin and neck. His face was ashen and sweaty, and I needed a goddamn ambulanceright fucking now.

His breathing became more labored, and he reached up to cup my wet cheek. “S’okay, Cruz.”

My chest hurt like I was having a heart attack of my own, though I knew it was something else causing my pain. I’d held this man at arm’s length for years, feeling like it would be disloyal to the man who raised me if I let Paul in. But I knewnow that love was bigger than that. There were no limits on how many people you could love. It was infinite.

So I leaned down and pressed a firm kiss to his damp forehead and whispered the words I should have said long ago.

“I love you, Dad.”

Chapter 39

“So your mom justpushed you out of the way and climbed into the ambulance with Paul?” Lehra asked with a hint of amusement.

I confirmed with a nod. “She did.” I’d immediately called Lehra after the ambulance arrived, and she sprinted over and insisted on riding to the hospital with me. Grateful for her presence, I’d held her hand the few minutes to the hospital and the entire time the doctor was explaining that my dad had indeed had a heart attack.

She snuggled beneath my arm, and I inhaled the fresh scent of her hair, so grateful for this amazing woman. “He’s going to be okay. The cardiologist said the stent surgery was quite routine.”

“I know.” Staring at the wooden door to the hospital room, I willed it to open.

“And they put him in a regular room on the cardiac floor, so that’s a good sign. He’s not in the intensive care unit.”

“True.” I moved us forward to get out of the way of a gurney holding an elderly man that was being pushed down the corridor. “Thank you for being here. You make me feel… comforted.”

“That’s me. Lehra the comfortable,” she chirped, kissing my chest. “How are you feeling about everything that happened? It had to be strange seeing your biological parents in the same room for the first time.”

“It was, but it wasn’t bad or anything. Their connection was just… there. Staring me right in the face. I didn’t expect that.”

Lehra gripped my chin and turned my face toward hers. “It’s okay to feel conflicted about it. You’ve only ever seen your mom with your papa. I felt really weird when I looked at my dad’s old yearbook and saw him escorting the homecoming queen—who was not my mother. I’d never even thought of him with someone else because them as a couple is all I’ve ever known. But we have to remember that our parents had a whole life before we came along.”

My eyes went to the door again. “I think he still loves her, and I’m surprisingly okay with that.”

“Love doesn’t have to be diluted by more love. Sometimes it makes it grow.”

“When did you get so wise?” I asked, smiling for what seemed like the first time in hours.

Before she could answer, the door swung open, and a nurse emerged. She was smiling. “You can go on in. Just don’t give Mr. Bouvier anything else to eat or drink because he’ll have surgery in a few hours.” She patted my arm. “He’s perfectly stable now.”

Lehra and I entered to find my mother fussing with the blankets on the bed. “Not even tucked properly,” she muttered, pulling the bottom of the sheet free before tucking it backproperly. “There. How’s a patient supposed to be comfortable if the sheets are all willy nilly?”

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