Page 88 of Rating the Book Boyfriend

Libby: Oh there were plenty in the book. It wasn’t very good, but it made me laugh.

Gemma: Since it was Easter-themed, please tell me there was a penis-related “he is risen” line.

Libby: I can confirm.

JoJo: Can we get back to the kinks?

Gemma: I’ve got one that’s literally pure gold… golden shower.

JoJo: No.

Gemma: Brown shower?

Ava: Oooh, I know someone who knows someone who dated a guy that had a glass table fetish.

Libby: WTF is that?

Ava: Where he lies beneath a glass table and the woman lays on top and… relieves herself.

JoJo: FFS, no bodily waste whatsoever. I can’t bring myself to write about peeing or dropping a deuce in a sexual manner.

Gemma: Can we go back to the fact that Ava “knows someone who knows someone who dated a guy?” Sounds a lot like “asking for a friend.”

Ava: I can assure you that is not my thing. I couldn’t even bring myself to pee in the toilet in front of Zach, and we were married.

JoJo: Hellooooo? Control your ADD brains and help me with kinks.

Ava: Pacifier play.

JoJo: Is that like that baby/mommy thing Gemma was talking about in Colorado?

Ava: No, the penis is the pacifier.

JoJo: Ah, gotcha. I’ll look it up and do some research.

Libby: You could do breeding kink. Kinda hot when he’s so obsessed that all he can think about is putting a baby in her.

JoJo: Another good possibility. This guy is kinda stalker-y, so it might work.

Gemma: Role play could be really fun. An endless supply of options.

Libby: In the same thread, he could have a clothing kink. Like he insists she wear fishnet stockings and garter belts. I dated a guy like that once. I broke up with him when he wanted me to sleep in fucking stockings.

JoJo: Adding it to the list. Lots of different ways that could go. Maybe he only wants her to wear satin panties or the color blue.

Gemma: Orrrrr…

Gemma: The color gold.

JoJo: I’m out.

Libby: Hope y’all have a Happy New Year!

Ava: You too.

Gemma: HNY

I’m cackling out loud when I hear a knock on my front door.

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