Page 3 of Rating the Book Boyfriend

Gemma cranes her neck forward, green eyes wide, and JoJo’s mouth gapes open. Ava is the only one who doesn’t look surprised because I’d called her the day after the breakup. She’s the most empathetic person I know, and I’d needed that during my post-breakup pity party.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you guys yet, but I needed time to process.”

“What happened?” JoJo asks, topping off my glass with a little bit of wine and a whole lot of vodka.

“He said he didn’t, and I quote,see a future with me.” The bitterness rang true in my tone.

“That fuckwad,” Gemma snaps. “You moved from Texas to Florida to be with him. He should have thought aboutthe futurebefore dragging you away from your home.”

“I didn’t have much left there anyway since my cousin, Gianna, moved to New York,” I reason lamely, and everyone’s faces soften with sympathy. “To be honest, it wasn’t that much of a surprise, and I’m more pissed than heartbroken. Does that make me sound bad?”

Gemma nudges me with her foot. “Not at all. You told me a few months ago that things had cooled off for you and prickface. You don’t need to be with someone that doesn’t know your worth and treat you accordingly, so maybe this is a positive thing.”

The other girls nod in agreement, and I fucking love these women.

I force a brightness into my tone. “Ya know, it’s cool. I’m moving to Port Saint Joe, which is a little over an hour away from Panama City Beach. It’s a small, cozy town, so I’m really excited. PCB is popular with the tourists and can get really crowded, so I’m looking forward to the slowed-down pace.”

“I know it sucks, but I’m happy you’ll be in a small town now,” Ava says, wrapping an arm around my shoulder and squeezing.

Needing a change of subject, I ask, “So what’s up with you, A? You heard from your man-child ex-husband recently?”

She takes a long pull of her boosted wine and barely winces this time. “Ohhh, yes. Zach called me the other day because his electricity got turned off. He didn’t know how to pay his electric bill online, so I had to walk him through it.”

We all burst into laughter. Fucking Zach. He’s lovable but has never grown up, and I’m glad Ava is no longer responsible for raising him—I mean isn’t married to him anymore.

A knock sounds at the door, and JoJo rises to answer it. “That must be the food.”

For the next thirty minutes we eat, drink, and laugh. It’s so good to be back with my girls again. We’d met in an author group on Facebook a few years ago and instantly hit it off. Though we only see each other in person a couple times a year, we text every day and talk often.

Gemma claims that if anyone ever got hold of our text threads, we’d either be arrested or declared clinically insane, and she’s probably right. It gets pretty crazy sometimes when four romance authors enter brainstorming mode.

After we clear our food away, I wash my hands, feeling the roughness of my skin beneath the foamy soap. “Anyone have lotion? The dry Colorado air is wreaking havoc on my skin.”

“I have some in our bathroom,” Gemma says, storing the leftovers in the fridge. “It’s in the hot-pink tube.”

Heading into the bathroom, I pick up a pink tube and carry it back into the living room, squirting a healthy dollop onto my palm.

“What kind of lotion is this, Gem? It’s really sticky,” I call out, settling onto the couch as I spread the goop between my fingers and up onto my forearms.

She walks in from the kitchenette and stares at the lotion I’d placed on the coffee table. Her eyes flick to my hands, which are covered in the thick, clear substance, and back to the tube.

“I said thehot-pinktube. That one isfuchsia.”

Lord, I hope I didn’t use one of her very expensive hair products. “Oh crap, sorry. Is this your hair gel or something?”

She picks up thefuchsiacontainer and holds it a couple inches from my face. I read the words.

Loob in a Toob.

“Oh my gawd!” I yell, jumping up and holding my arms out to the side like they’re covered in a hazardous material. “I just rubbed your pussy lube all over me!”

Everyone else is in hysterics. JoJo has fallen onto the floor and is holding her stomach, and Ava has tears streaming down her pretty face as I flail my goo-covered hands around wildly.

My eyes widen as a thought occurs to me. “Please tell me it’s not your butt lube. For the love of all that’s good and holy,please, Gemma!”

She’s not even trying to hide her laughter as she shakes her head. “No, this is the front door one. The back door stuff is in a coral tube.”

“Coral! Fuchsia! Pink!” I holler. “Why are they all so close? Haven’t these people ever heard of blue? Or yellow? Fuck!”

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