Page 16 of Caged in Flames

Chapter Eight

The week carries on without any major drama. By Friday, the halls are ramped up with school spirit for the first game of the year. My eyes drift over to the other side of the hall where Charlie and Sawyer are standing surrounded by the crowd. They have their white and gold jerseys on.

I roll my eyes.

Sophomore year could have been just as simple. I could have focused on my schoolwork and violin practice while pretending they didn't exist. Instead, I had trash thrown at me while people set out to remind me that I didn’t belong here. All because a group of teenage boys couldn’t fathom me being in the same building as them.

Every insult from a stranger felt like a physical lash. If that were to happen now, I would be interested to see my own reaction. Maybe throw a punch? Would I stand on high ground and walk away? Verbal tongue lashing?

I pull my phone out of my back pocket to text Jane. She's asked me several times this week to go to the game with her, but I don't have any interest in that. The party tomorrow though sounds like a lot of fun.

I send off a quick message letting her know we could meet at my dorm before she and Gunner walk to the football field then slam my locker door. It feels like closing the door on the anxiety that’s been eating at me all week.

I’m too invested in the hundreds of emojis and gifs that my new fiery friend is sending over to notice the presence approaching me. I barely make it two steps down the hallway before Jude slides up next to me. “Phoenix, can I have a second of your time?”

Is he requesting a meeting with the CEO of I don't give a fuck? “You wasted more than one second on that sentence, so no, you cannot have anything more.”

He rushes to keep up with my steps, because I'm speed walking like a granny at the mall. “Please, seeing you all week and not getting a chance to speak has been killing me.”

Stopping in my tracks, I take a moment to look him up and down. “Interesting word choice, shit stain.” I’m not actually triggered by his phrasing but fucking with him is fun.

Jude used to be so easy to talk to. We would spend hours together talking about anything or nothing at all, and every moment still felt important. He deserves a fucking Oscar for his role in my takedown.

He grimaces. “You’re right, that was unintentional, but completely insensitive.”

My phone vibrates with Jane’s reply that she’s running a few minutes late from her last class. “You have one minute but remember what I said before classes started.” Not that he deserves it, but I can spare some time to settle my own curiosity.

He runs his hand through his shoulder length blonde waves, and I try not to remember what it felt like to have my fingers trace that same path. “I won’t apologize because you said not to. Not that I have any excuses to offer you except the blind loyalty to my best friend.” When he settles his shoulders, determination shines in his eyes. “I won’t ask for a second chance, but I promise you I’ll do everything to earn one.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” I adjust my book bag on my shoulder, fidgeting with the strap to hide the shaking of my hand, hopefully making it less noticeable. I don't like where he seems to be taking this, and it’s unsettling my calm mood from before.

He gently sets his hand on my shoulder so that we are eye to eye for his next words. “I might be the worst of us.” The look I give him must confirm his feelings, but he keeps going. “I knew I was completely in love with you, and I still didn’t stop us from putting you through everything we did.”

I tear my shoulder away from him. Is he setting me up again? I look around, but there’s no audience hanging onto our words. I’m briefly assaulted by memories of resting my head on his shoulder while reading, of holding hands underneath lunch tables, of his body towering over mine. I shake out of it, remembering that I was only ever a game for him. No matter what he’s saying, he still followed his friends when it all crashed down on me.

No fucking way. I let all the hurt I feel in my heart burn its way into a fierce anger running through my veins. Staring at him in silence for a few more moments before I huff out a laugh.

“Leave me the fuck alone.” Storming off, I shove my way through the doors marking the school’s exit. I let all the feelings coursing through my body seep through every single step.

How fucking dare he? The actual audacity to blurt out lies of love. I can never decide which of them I hate more, but today Jude is in the lead. He loved me? No, you don’t destroy love. You hold onto it, and you never let anything tear it down. Not even your best friends.

After leaving Jude behind in the hallways, I make it back to my room in time to be accosted by a squealing Jane.

“Okay, I realize I am new to the whole friend thing, but are they always as giddy as you?" I open my door while Jane glides in behind me. Sure, I've had people to talk to in classes prior to Blisshaven. I've never had anyone that wanted to spend time with me though. I guess maybe I never noticed how much I put into making good grades and playing the violin in my room, until I found people worth skipping out on those things for.

Jane sighs dramatically. “If only everyone in the world were lucky enough to have a Jane.” She leans against the wall with her arm over her face, as if the very thought of anyone living life without her makes her faint. I snort.

Over the last week, whenever I see a message from Jane or Gunner asking to meet up for anything, I find myself smiling. Even for things like doing homework or talking about what we are all craving for lunch. It's pretty cool to get a notification that wasn't a calendar alert or a message from my mom.

I throw my bag down by the door and run my fingers through my hair, pulling it up in a messy bun, huffing out a breath that has my bangs flying off my forehead. "Not that I want to talk about it, but your cousin just pissed me off." Walking to my closet, I quickly change into a pair of leggings and an oversized sweater.

"I feel like you're missing an opportunity tonight, Nix." I can hear the plotting in her tone and as much as I want to ignore it, I'm still curious.

"What opportunity is that? The one where I go sit outside in the heat with the bugs and watch stupid testosterone driven boys pummel each other into the grass while pretending to understand the barbaric rules of what they call a game?"

When I walk back into the living room, Jane is looking around the place as if she doesn't know which spot to hop into first.

The girl bounces through the room, before plopping herself on the couch, and the smile she gives me is nothing but devious.