Page 48 of Christmas with my Three Best Friends

“I know I’m sulking,” I tell her after a long period of silence.

“You’re the one who came into my office to talk,” she says, slightly amused, but the concern in her eyes is real. I love her more for it, truth be told.

“I’m just trying to gather my thoughts.”

She nods slowly. “This is about Richard and the other gym?”

“And Jax and his commitment issues. And Marius and Roxanne. And Vincent. And so much more. I’m overwhelmed, and I don’t know what to do with myself anymore,” I say. Tears work their way up, making my eyes sting and my vision blurry. I try to blink them back, but a couple still manage to slip and roll down my cheeks.

“Okay, let’s start somewhere, Shay. Talk to me about Richard first. How do you feel about him?”

“You sound like a therapist again,” I say.

She rolls her eyes. “Iama therapist. And even though I’m notyourtherapist, this is how I get to the root of things. You either want my help or you don’t,” she says, though not unkindly.

I sigh. She’s right. I did come here to talk to her. “Fine. How do I feel about Richard? Other than the fact that I’m pretty sure I’ve fallen in love with him? I feel abandoned by him. He was supposed to stick with us through thick and thin. West Key was supposed to be our baby, our project, our way of showing other gyms how to do things right.”

“Don’t you think you could forge ahead without Richard?”

I shake my head. “He’s the visionary, Cass. He’s the one with the business mindset. He’ll look at sales figures on a spreadsheet and tell us if it’s working or not. And he’s been right on the money every goddamn time, which is why his imminent departure is basically telling me we’re about to fail.”

“Ah, so it’s failure you truly dread.”

“Am I not entitled to dread failure after having invested two years of my life into that place?”

Cassandra gives me another nod. “Of course. You are absolutely entitled. But is it really failure? Or is it just time for West Key to spread its wings and fly without Richard as a safety net? Think about it this way. You already have a clientele there. Not at big as other gyms, true, but they’re loyal. With your new fitness programs, you could definitely get more people through the door. And if Richard is leaving, maybe it’s because he has faith in Jax and Marius and you. Maybe it’s not because he thinks the gym is going to fail.”

“I have a hard time believing that. Richard isn’t the kind to back away from imminent success,” I grumble, nervously cracking my knuckles.

“You’re mad at him.”

“Yeah. I am mad. He’s betraying us.”

“He did ask you to go with him.”

I can’t help but scoff. “He’s betraying the four of us. We agreed even before Chappaqua that we’d stick together. The four of us. Four. Not two. The four of us. We’d stick together and we’d weather any storm. Yet at the first sign of financial discomfort, his attention span is already drastically shortened. He wants another gym. Another plaything, because West Key isn’t fun and exciting anymore.”

“So your frustration with Richard is purely from a business perspective,” Cassandra concludes.

“I guess.”

“But it’s spilling into your personal life. You told me you walked out of his place that night and took a cab home, and that you haven’t seen or spoken to him in a couple of days.”

“Yeah…” Why do I feel like a kid being reprimanded by the teacher? Why do I feel bad when Richard is the one screwing us over.

Cassandra quietly processes everything I’ve just said, while I try to gather more of my rambling thoughts into something more coherent.

“What about Jax? What was the issue regarding his commitment?”

I roll my eyes as I remember the incident with Alice. “I’m pretty sure he was flirting with Alice, the receptionist.”

“Jax and Alice? No way. She’s so far from his type, she’s like Pluto to the Sun.”

“Granted, I may have misunderstood the entire scene. Maybe she was flirting with him. He did tell her no, but only when he saw me.”

“And did you talk to him about it?”

My face burns with the shame of acknowledging my own shortcomings on the matter. I sink deeper into my chair. “No.”

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