Page 18 of Beautiful & Dirty

“If you want to find out sooner rather than later,” I say, breaking the anger I can see building inside her, “I’m more than happy to oblige.”

She swallows loudly, and her body begins to tremble. “The Greek gave me money to put together a petty gang to gun for you.”

“Their names,” I demand.

She nods and starts speaking.

I listen intently. With each word, a new part of my body ices over, not because any of the names matter but because I’m weary. No one stays in this position longer than they’re meant to; I firmly believe that. I don’t know how much longer I have here, but the twinge in my back and the vague ache of the still-healing gunshot wound let me know that it might be time to consider a retirement plan before someone decides for me. But if I want to step down on my own two legs, I need to put everyone gunning to take my spot six feet under one last time.

“What’s the plan, boss?” Alfonso asks as we ascend from the wine cellar.

“Take her south,” I say to him.

He nods and pulls his phone from his back pocket. I hear him arranging to secret my wife out of the city to a town she always hated.

“And me?” Giulio asks, his voice eager and vaguely deadly.

“You got the list. I want them all taken care of.”

“Need me to be discreet?” he asks, sounding disappointed at the prospect.

I smile vaguely. “Absolutely not. I want The Greek to know that I’m coming for him.”

Giulio smiles. “Sure thing, boss.”

He turns and practically runs toward the door. I used to be like that, eager to do my job because the big decisions weren’t mine to make. I miss that. The weight of responsibility has sucked all the joy from my job, and I envy Giulio his relative freedom. I call his name without thinking.

He stops, his hand on the doorknob, and turns to me. “Boss?”

I’m about to ask him about Shae, and that’s stupid. Giulio’s strengths don’t include surveillance, and besides, I still don’t know anything more about her than how wet and warm her cunt felt around my dick. Seeing him so mindlessly happy makes me think of her, but I can’t tell Giulio that. I can’t tell anyone that, for her sake and my own.

“When you’re done, take a break,” I tell him. “Get out of town.” It’s a sound security measure as well as a reward.

He smiles, “Got it, boss,” and then he turns and heads out into the night.

I’m standing alone in the kitchen to my country home, and I can practically hear my long-dead father-in-law’s voice in my head.We all pay a price for power.

At the time, I’d thought I’d paid the ultimate price; I’d married his daughter. For twenty years, I’ve confined myself to a loveless marriage and given up any fantasies I had of a family, but apparently, there was an outstanding debt. If I want to stay in power, I need to let go of any hope that I’ll see Shae again, and I need to bury the desire to look for her deeper than I buried Flavia’s father.

Weary isn’t a strong enough word.

Epilogue

Six Weeks Later

I’ve beena bridesmaid six times in my life, but Zahra’s wedding was the one I’d been looking forward to since I was a kid. I was supposed to be her bridesmaid and Zoe her maid of honor, but instead, I’m playing go-between with the sisters because they’re not talking. I’m not commenting on the fact that Zoe’s not in the maid of honor dress, and I’m not telling Zahra how fucked up that is. Instead, I’m rushing from Zahra’s bridal suite to Zoe’s hotel room three floors down. I’m rushing back and forth between the sisters, so they don’t have to look back on this day and regret not sharing this moment together.

I’ve been trying to appease them all morning, and I’m fucking tired.

“Hey, honey, you alright?” Aunt Caroline asks me.

I’m sitting on a bench by the elevator, trying to catch my breath.

“Oh, I’m fine,” I say, swiping at the sweat at my brow. I yawn. “I’m just tired.”

“Oooh,” Caroline says with a smile. “Did that scrawny little boyfriend of yours keep you up all night?”

“Caroline!” I shriek. “Ew.”

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