Page 59 of Truths

“Let's not lie to each other. Sutton's my grandma's name. Your mother and I talked once about what we'd name our kids, and I said I wanted the name Sutton for a girl. At the time, though, I assumed my daughter would have my last name, not one from a dirty biker.”

Swallowing, she feels her head spin. Her mother never told her where her name came from, but she didn't suspect it would be from her biological father's family. “What did you want if you had a boy?”

“Ryan.”

Obviously.“Mom named me after your grandmother because she knew I was your daughter. That sounds about right.”

“I know it's hard to believe, you know, considering how I reacted when you said your mom's name, but she and I were really hot and heavy for a while. I thought I might marry her one day.”

“Really?”God, I would have been so screwed if that was the case.

Ryan nods and sits on the couch, his greasy hair falling onto his forehead and sticks. It looks like he hasn't showered in a couple of days, and the cologne she hadn't noticed at first seems to be his way to hide his sweat scent. Now, though, it creates a nauseating combination that assaults her nose.

“I knew she was also fucking a biker, but that was only when I was locked up. She never once told me she was pregnant. If she had... well, I think things would have been different.”

“Did you love each other?”

“We did. It was aRomeo and Juliettype of love.”

Sutton can see he's lying. There's nothing but malice in his eyes. “If you were so in love, why was she sleeping with my- with Cannon?” It's taking more time than she expects to use Cannon instead of “Dad” or “my dad” in conversation.

“There was just too much passion between us, and it manifested in the wrong ways,” he says, smiling to himself. She can't help but wonder if he even knows what the longer word means, considering he doesn't come across as overly intelligent. “Fighting, shouting, screwing, and then screwing others. I cheated, and so did she.”

Her mom and Cannon fought, but not like that. At least, she doesn't think Cannon ever cheated. Her mom... yeah, probably. “You cheated, too?”

“I'm not proud of it. How'd you find out about me?”

“Mom was in the hospital. I had to go through her mess of paperwork, and I stumbled upon a letter she wrote where she told you about me. I was fifteen when she wrote it, and she never sent it. My thinking is that she kept it as a way to hurt my dad... I mean, Cannon, one day.”

Ryan laughs. “Yeah, that sounds like the Grace I know. Always manipulative. But it was so fun sometimes.”

The look in his eyes this time seems to be of fondness. Probably remembering something gross and not fitting for a daughter to know. “She said you had just gotten locked up for the fourth time or something, and that's why she didn't send it. She never confirmed why she kept it, though.”

“Look at you. You sound so grown up and educated. You'd be the first in my family to graduate high school. You did graduate high school, right?”

“Yes.”

“Wow, I got me a smart daughter. Did you go to college?”

Nodding, she feels a dangerous warning bell in her head. “I got my associate’s degree. I work as a receptionist at a vet clinic.”

An unnerving smirk appears on his face. “I did a lot of bad things, Sutton. I'm not going to deny that, but I don't think you're too surprised, either. I mean, you grew up thinking a sleazy biker was your dad. You're used to trash people, right?”

Against her better judgment, she gets defensive. “I don't know what you think you know about Cannon, but-”

“I stole a lot of things in my life,” he says, cutting her off. “It always felt like something was missing, and I think I kept taking things to fill that void. Until I met you, I never knew what that void was. Now, I know it was because I was missing you. I didn't know about you, but somewhere, I think I felt you. In the universe, you know?”

Now, it all makes sense. Was her mom gullible enough to fall for this bullshit? “Yeah?”

“Yeah, I want to get to know you, Sutton. I want to be a real father to you.”

I have a father. One who is kind enough to let me deal with all this bullshit without pushing me. I don't need you in my life.

“I'm a little old to need a father,” she says, hoping to veer him away from this conversation and leave her apartment. “I'm still dealing with all of this information that was just shoved in my face, and seeing you that day really overwhelmed me. Talking to you gives me a lot to process, but I'll come by your work when I'm ready to talk again.”

Walking to the door, Sutton opens it, smiling to make him believe she's really considering having him in her life. To her surprise, he stands and walks to the door, but he stops before he's in the doorway.

“I don't work at that fucking taco shithole anymore. They have terrible management, and the food gives everyone the runs. Iwant to spend time with you, but there's one problem, Sutton,” Ryan says.

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