Page 34 of Truths

“No. Not anymore.”

Looking up, he narrows his eyes. “Because I snapped at you? Sutton, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to take my anger out on you. This whole thing has me really fucked up. My brother's not only fucking my ex, who humiliated me in my own clubhouse, but he got the club to buy her shop. Most people aren't stuck with their exes in their lives like this after a breakup. I just... I lost it.”

“I'm not holding a grudge because you snapped at me. I have a lot going on right now. Actually, I am kind of pissed at you for snapping at me because you forced me to do something I didn't want to. Something I wished I'd never done.”

“Meeting Ryan?”

Sutton nods and looks away from him. “Meeting him was a mistake, and I'm really trying to figure out where exactly I fit now. I'm not a Cannon, and I can't stand the thought of my mother. I mean, I always kind of despised her because she's not what most would consider to be stable or motherly, but knowing she kept that letter because she wanted to hurt Cannon one day really sets the bar high on what she's willing to do to people.”

“You think that's why she kept the letter?”

“That, or she wanted to throw it in my face one day. Either way, her intention was to hurt someone. I have no doubts at all about that fact. But... that's my mother.”

“You're still a daughter of the club. Cannon would die for you, Sutton.”

Tears fill her eyes, but she blinks them away before they have a chance to escape. “But he shouldn't. I'm not his daughter. I'm no one to him.”

“That's not true at all. You're his daughter. I don't understand why you're fighting against it so hard. Do you hate him?”

“No!” she shouts and looks at him. “I wish I did, but I don't hate him. If I did, this would all be so much easier.”

“Then why can't you just accept that the blood flowing through your veins doesn't mean shit? I mean, all of those guys in the club are my brothers, even though only one shares DNA with me. But I see them all the same.”

Crossing her arms under her chest, she glares. He said something wrong. “Would you have the reaction you had about Daphne moving on if it was one of them instead of Max with her?”

Fuck, she got me there.“I don't know.”

“Then you're lying to me. You do know that you wouldn't react the same way, or you don't really see the rest of them the same way you see Max. They're your brothers, but they're notyourrealbrothers. Just like I'm Cannon's daughter, but I'm not Cannon'srealdaughter.”

“What does that matter?”

Sniffling, Sutton doubles down. “Why does the club buying the shop from an ex-girlfriend you said you never really loved matter?”

Standing, Nelson shakes his head. “I know what you're doing. You're trying to find correlations between shit just like I did in order to hurt me. But it's not going to work, Sutton. Because nothing you can say will hurt me.”

“And that's the perfect reason why we don't fit together.”

“What are you talking about?”

“If you care about someone, they have the ability to hurt you. You keep yourself so guarded, never allowing anyone to get close to you, so you don't have to feel hurt. It's a reason not to let people in. But you make mistakes with that. You don't realize that people do care, and you really don't realize that your words have weight. They have meaning. And they really fucking hurt.”

He licks his lips and lets out a slow breath. “I've never been one to get attached to anyone because I didn't want to go through the heartbreak I've seen so many others go through.”

“And by doing that, you create heartbreak for others. You hurt Daphne by not letting her in, and you let her suffer with her pain by herself. Just like you said something you knew would hurt me without much of a second thought. I thought things could be different between us because we were friends first, but I'm no different than anyone else in your life.”

“That's not true. You're different fromeveryoneelse in my life.”

“I want to be alone right now. Can you please leave?”

His eyes study her. “Sutton, the last thing you should be right now is alone.”

“I don't want you here, Nelson. I'm done, and in order to do that, I need to not be around you. I need you to walk away and leave me be. I don't mean anything to you-”

“That's not true.”

She shakes her head at his words, and he feels like nothing he says will prove this fact to her. “It's how you make me feel. I feel like I don't mean anything to you, but you mean something to me. No matter how much I wish you didn't, you do. And it hurts being around you. The power you have has a lot of potential to hurt me, and I would rather be alone than risk that. So, please, go.”

The resolve on her face tells him she means every word. Especially when she says she doesn't feel like she means anything to him. He knows she means everything to him, but there's nothing he can say that will convince her of that fact. Not after how he screwed up.

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