Page 85 of Darkness

“Don’t say but.” I don’t know what she’s thinking, but we can be together and she’s pushing me away.

“You can’t leave her, she’ll be in danger.” Tess turns to face me, and leans in closer. “Cain, you were my first love, the man I wanted everything with. I knew the boy who fought to live, I loved the man it made you. But Autumn-Rose, she loves you with all the darkness, and the demons who carry with you. She loves you for who you are, including all the scars, your past, and even the danger she’s in. Yet, she loves you, think of the amount of tears she has cried over the last three days for you, prayed for you. She loves you so much more than I ever could.” She leans her forehead on mine. “Give her your beautiful heart, Cain, it belongs to her, not me.”

Tess pulls away from me, and looks down at Autumn laughing, she’s telling me the story about a customer coming to the shop and what they had written on the card.

“She rambles all the time.” I listen to Autumn, before tuning back to Tess.

“Do you love her, Cain?” The question I’ve been asking myself, and don’t know what to say.

“Tess, I tried to push her away from me, I can’t let her live in fear. Before when it was just me, dying didn’t scare me, but I’m so scared I’ll lose her. I don’t want to lose her.” I look back down at Autumn wiping the tears away, as Hayden stands behind her rubbing her shoulders.

“You know Hayden has done so much for you. He helped when I was around, and he’s there for her. You owe him a lot.” Tess lets out a chuckle, and now I see Hayden from here, that man has done a lot for me.

“She would be-”

“Cain. You’re so scared of hurting again, you won’t open yourself to her. You would rather her feel the pain of losing you, than for you to feel the pain of loving again?” Oh, Tess has hit it with this statement.

But is she right?

Am I too scared to give Autumn everything, because I’m scared of being hurt again?

“The demons still live inside me, families are after me all the time, how can I make her live this life?” My voice breaks a little, because I can’t have anything happen to Autumn because of me. I can’t allow it.

“And you told her all this, and she’s still here. I knew she would be perfect for you. I did everything I could to push you two together. I can’t believe how stubborn you are.” I shake my head, and turn to Tess when she gets off the wall, looking down at Autumn shouting.

“What’s happening?” I ask her.

“They’re losing you, and I’m not letting you stay here. Fight this, Cain. Be the man I fell in love with. Fight. Fight this Cain.” Tess leans in closer, gives me a soft gentle kiss, then pushes me into The Pit.

I wave my hands into the air, I don’t have a rope around me, I’m going to hit the ground hard.

Without warning, a sharp, searing gasp jerks me awake. My lungs inhale the air because it feels like I’ve not had any in them for a while. Raw and agonizing as if my body had temporarily forgotten how to breathe. I cough violently, my chest burns, as I come back to consciousness. The sound of my racing heartbeat thumps in my ears, and the pain in my chest returns with a vengeance, burning and more intense than a few seconds ago.

Fuck.

Blinking a few times, I try to focus on what’s happening around me, but everything is blurry.

“Cain, stay still.” I hear a voice, but can’t think whose it is.

“Cain, man let Doc work on you.” Lincoln, I know that’s Lincoln.

“Autu…Autu-”

“She’s here, she’s safe. Let’s get you checked out first,” Lincoln shouts.

I fight my body to calm down, but it feels like it’s on fire at the moment. Reminding myself I’m in the best hands, Doc will get me back to one hundred percent. My body slowly relaxes, as I look around the room wanting to see Autumn.

There she is in the corner of the bedroom, her arms wrapped around her waist, she looks so scared, tired.

Hayden has his arm around her. Comforting her as best he can. She looks at me, and I smile, well the best I can. She needs to know I’m good, I’m fighting this fight.

Doc told me to stay in bed for the day just to recover which made everyone laugh. I’m awake and I'm not laying in bed. Right now the only thing I want to do is show my girl how much I’ve fucking missed her. But I haven’t been able to move because Doc is taking his time removing all the wires.

I watch Autumn talking to Lincoln and she shakes her head, she looks like she’s not slept in days. Lincoln will catch me up with everything, and by the end of the day I will know what’s happening, and what my next step for Yang is.

“Cain, you need at least a week before you fight, or go to The Pit. I’m wasting my breath telling you this because I know you well enough.” Doc finally removes everything, and I push the covers off me.

“Everyone out.” Without a word, everyone leaves my bedroom. The family has never been to my apartment and now they’re in my bedroom. But I don’t care, because while I’ve been unconscious, they’ve looked after my Rose.

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