Page 14 of Penalized Love

Fuck.

“I don’t know, Dad,” I say as I set the parfait on my nightstand. “I’m not sure if I’m ready to jump back into school just yet.”

Dad places a comforting hand on my shoulder. “That makes sense. It’s a big decision, and you don’t have to make it right away. Just know that the option is there if you want it. I’ve also got special permission for you to begin your classes virtually at first if that would make things easier as well.”

It doesn’t make things easier for me. The extra tidbit complicates things because of how accommodating Crestwood is. “Thanks, Dad. I’ll think about it.”

I find those words meaningless because, in my mind, I have already made the decision. If Crestwood will help me get back on my feet and bring some normalcy to my life, I would be foolish not to take the opportunity.

Even if it means seeing Asher again.

6

ASHER

Ican’t fight the yawn that slides out of my mouth as I run a hand down my face. Shaking my head to clear the sleep fog does little to help my current state. I’m trying to wake up after not getting enough sleep the night before, and it’s proving to be a bigger challenge than I thought.

I blink my eyes once and then twice as I focus on forcing myself out of bed. With a groan, I sit up and swing my legs over the side of the bed. The first thing I reach for is my phone on the nightstand.

6:23 a.m.

Of course I would wake up seven minutes before I had set my alarm to go off.

With a heavy sigh, I unlock my phone and find a missed call and two text messages from Mom. I swipe them open and see that she wanted to check on me because I haven’t spoken to her in about a week, outside of a couple of text messages here and there.

I send her a quick message, letting her know I’m doing okay and that I’m just busy. It’s not entirely true, but I don’t have the energy to dive into anything more than that right now. I’ll callher later when I’m more awake and can string together more than two sentences.

I set my phone back down and force myself to start getting ready for the day. My head needs to be in the game because I can’t afford to let myself get distracted. Hockey is my ticket away from my past, allowing me a pathway to take care of my family the way they should be.

With that in mind, I stroll into the bathroom and turn on the shower. Once the water has warmed up, I strip off the boxers I wore to bed and hop in without a second thought.

The hot water flows down my shoulders, easing some of the tension built up there. Hopefully, I can knock the rest of this tension out because the last thing I need is to be tight on the ice. This early morning practice will also fix my bad mood.

I finish my shower and dry off. I throw on some clean clothes and grab my backpack and hockey bag, double-checking that I have everything I need for the day. My stomach grumbles, reminding me I’m hungry, but that will be solved soon.

As I step out of my room, I nearly collide with Knox, one of my roommates. He mumbles something, but I can’t quite catch it as he stumbles toward the bathroom. Our eyes meet for a split second, and he glares at me. I’m chalking it up to both of us having had a long night. In fact, I’m surprised to see him up this early.

I walk downstairs, and silence greets me. That’s not surprising. I normally wouldn’t be down here at this time either, but I promised my best friend, Levi, I would go with him to one of our on-campus coffee shops, so here we are.

I use my phone to light the way as I make my way into the kitchen. Once in there, I grab the protein-packed smoothie I made the day before, shake it up, and gulp it down as fast as possible. Once I finish and rinse the cup out, I head toward the door because Levi will be here shortly.

The vibration of my phone in my hand causes me to jump as I head toward the front door. I step outside into the cool morning breeze as my screen lights up. It’s Mom.

I swipe to answer the call.

“Hey, Mom,” I say as I hold the phone to my ear, locking the front door behind me with my free hand. “Everything okay?”

“Asher, honey, I’m sorry to call so early,” Mom’s voice comes through the speaker. She sounds tired, but that’s normal for her with everything going on. “I did see your message, but I just wanted to check in before my shift starts.”

“No worries, I was already up,” I assure her, walking down the porch steps. “I’m waiting for Levi to come by and pick me up. We have practice soon.”

“Of course, so I won’t keep you. How are you really doing, Ash? Is there anything I can do to help you?”

I let out a breath, buying some time before I need to answer. “I’m hanging in there. Just taking it one day at a time. It’s a lot, with classes, hockey, and everything, but I’m managing. How are things with you?”

“Oh, you know, the usual,” Mom says with a tired chuckle. “Working, paying bills, and making sure Avery gets to school on time. She misses you, by the way. Keeps asking when you’ll visit or if we can come to you.”

Guilt hits me square in the chest. It’s been weeks since I’ve seen my mom and sister. “I miss her and you too.” I pause for a second to think. “Let me see if I can come home for a weekend soon.”

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