Page 82 of All My Broken Pieces

She’s lying on her back, staring at the ceiling, but she won’t respond. Why won’t she respond?

“¿Mamá?” I shake her shoulder, my eyes stinging as tears form. “¿Qué está sucediendo?” She just keeps staring. “Por favor no me ignores.Me estás asustando.” My cries grow louder as I’m met with silence.

I blink back the memory, trying to focus on what’s happening now. There’s nothing I can do to change what happened, no wayI can save my mom from her habit, but I can help Fallon. I have to be able to.

“What did she take?” I hear Coop’s voice and try to reply but can’t get the words past the lump in my throat.

Ava’s voice filters through the haze of emotions as she answers. Cooper nods, gently lifting Fallon’s eyelids to check her eyes. Pushing up to his feet, he grabs his jacket once more and digs in the pockets. His eyes shoot to mine as he pulls out a small kit.

I suck in a breath, recognizing the emblem on the case. “Wh-why do you have that?” I manage to force out.

He smiles sadly. “One of the perks of the job. You know, when someone calls, ‘is there a doctor here’ and I have to respond, ‘yeah’? Well, I like to be prepared.” Shrugging, he unzips the black bag and pulls out a syringe and a small vial of clear liquid.

“What did she take?”

“I-I don’t know, she…” Papá runs his hands through his hair, darting his eyes around the room. “May-maybe, um…” He trails off, shifting from side to side.

The man kneeling beside Mamá looks at Papá. “Sir, it’s very important we know what she took so we can help.” His eyes shift to me, some of the hardness in his expression softening. “Hi, sweetheart, why don’t you go wait outside while I talk to your dad?” I nod my head, scrambling backward.

I can hear their muffled voices as I wait in the hall, the image of Mamá lying so still won’t leave my mind. Peeking back into the room, I watch the man pull out a small bag. He unzips it and pulls out a syringe and a small glass bottle. I watch with wide eyes as he stabs the needle into the bottle and then into Mamá’s arm.

Closing my eyes, I scoot away from the door and sink to the floor, cupping my face in my hands.

Tears slip down my cheeks as I watch Cooper inject the naloxone into Fallon’s arm, the same overwhelming helplessness filling me as it did when I was a seven-year-old girl watching the paramedic try to save my mom’s life.

I suck in breath after breath, hoping this time it will work.

Chapter 40

Fallon

“To be accepted, for me.”

I release a heavy breath, a weight I didn’t know I was carrying lifting off my chest at the admission.

The woman smiles at me, reaching over to pat my arm. Closing her fingers around my wrist, she lifts my hand, palm up. She runs her finger from the edge up my palm up to my elbow, tracing the veins.

I tilt my head, watching the movement. A strange sensation emanates from her skin on mine, something I can’t decipher.

The woman gently places my arm back in my lap, shifting her gaze over the ocean as she speaks, a somber tone to hervoice. “I’m going to tell you some pretty harsh truths, Fallon.” She pauses, lifting her hand to adjust a pair of glasses I didn’t notice before. “There’s always going to be people out there who want to make you smaller. People who are so insecure in whotheyare that they need to makeyoufeel like you aren’t enough so that they can feel better.” Her words hang in the air, swirling around us and echoing in my mind. She smiles at me, her golden hair blowing in the wind.

Did she always have blonde hair?

“But you want to know the beautiful thing in it all?” I blink at her, nodding my head. “When you love yourself,” She reaches forward, taking both my hands in hers.

I glance down, confusion clouding my thoughts. Turning our clasped hands, I can’t tell whose hands are whose, nearly identical length, markings, even the chipped nail polish matches. Lifting my gaze, I gasp.

The woman, no, me? I smile at myself. “When you love yourself, no one else can take that from you.Thatis how you find true happiness. That is how we find love and acceptance. Not through them, not through anyone else, not even through her. It has to come from us.”

I open my mouth to respond, but before I can get out a word, the woman disappears. Looking around the empty beach, I try to find her, me, but I’m all alone. I glance down, tears welling in my eyes when I find my hands clasped around a thick, leather journal.

“Mmmm.” I groan, shifting uncontrollably.

Everything hurts.

I groan again, trying to blink open my eyes, but even that small movement sends a wave of agony throughout my head.

“Shhh. Take it easy, baby.” Arriana’s voice fills me with equal parts excitement and shame. “She’s waking up!” I hear her call.

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