Page 14 of All My Broken Pieces

My life. I won’t survive without you.

The thoughts swirl as I build her up, her body tensing. Just as she grows close to her release, I sit upright, making her cry out, “Why?”

“Why?” I whisper, licking my lips and finding the taste of her on them. “Why?” I repeat louder, moving to hover over her, my legs straddling hers as I’m inches above her face. “You’re right.Why? Why thefuckare you leaving?” I growl, my hurt morphing into anger.

Her eyes widen, never having been on the other end of my wrath. “I-I-” She stammers.

I run my fingers down her throat, tracing down her body slowly. “You?”

“I-I can’t do this.” She cries, gasping as I shove two fingers inside of her.

“You can’t do what, baby?” I ask, curling my fingers. Her head pushes back into the pillow, body arching as I brush against her sweet spot. “Answer the question.” I demand, stopping my movements.

Her eyes fly open, a heat to match my own anger burning in the green pools. When I make no move to resume fingering her, she closes her eyes, releasing a heavy breath. “I can’t keep hurting you.” She whispers.

My heart stops.

“Baby.”

She doesn’t respond.

I rest on my forearm, gripping her chin with my free hand. “Baby, look at me.” Blinking her eyes open, she meets mine. “You’re hurting me now.” I murmur, running my thumb along her jaw.

She flinches, a fresh wave of agony crossing her face. “I know.” The words are barely a breath, a broken acknowledgement to what she’s doing. But it doesn’t stop her from ripping my heart from my chest and tearing it to shreds.“It’s better this way. It-” She takes a deep breath before continuing. “It’ll hurt less now than later.”

I search her eyes, desperate to find what changed, what happened to bring this all on. “There doesn’t have to be a later,mi vida.I love you. I fuckingloveyou.” I curl my fingers inside of her, pushing my palm down on her clit. Her eyes roll back, breasts pressing against mine. “You’re my life. I-I won’t survive without you.” I admit, my voice cracking. “Please stay.”

My fingers brush against that spot again and her mouth falls open in a silent cry as her orgasm washes over her. I watch her closely, memorizing every small movement, every little detail.

Because, even as I said the words, even as I laid my heart bare, I knew it wasn’t enough.

She’s already left me.

The moment she packed that bag.

She was gone.

Chapter 5

Fallon

“What is it, baby?” Arriana murmurs, brushing my hair back as she leans forward to rest her chin on my shoulder.

I nestle back into her embrace, staring down at the empty page of my document. I’ve been dabbling in writing out some of the stories that have been circling in my mind. It’s been a while since I tried this, the last time didn’t end well when my parents discovered the nature of my stories and deemed them “sinful” and “ungodly” and demanded I throw everything out.

My heart pounds harder at the memory resurfacing, only adding fuel to my seemingly endless writer's block.

Sighing heavily, I lock my tablet and curl up against Arriana. “I don’t know why I can’t seem to get what’s up here,” I tap my forehead. “Down here.” Tapping my finger on the locked screen, I blink back the tears pricking at my eyes.

This is useless. I don’t know why I ever thought I could do this.

“Hey.” Arriana pulls me from my thoughts, turning her head to place a soft kiss to my throat. “It’ll come. I have total faith in you, baby.”

I wake with a start, instinctively reaching out beside me. My heart cracks as I find I’m alone in the dark room. I can still feel Arriana’s arms around me, a fading memory from my dream.

Curling up into a ball, I wrap the blankets around my shivering body, trying to warm the chill in my bones.

I did the right thing.

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